prattled on about nothing in particular, but he never expected me to join in on the conversation, which was fine by me. Plus he let me drive, unlike a certain bunny I know.

That night I was sitting in the car after shift, staring across the empty parking lot at headquarters and sipping my coffee while trying to think about anything besides how badly I wanted to call you, when you called me.

I almost spilled my coffee, I was so happy to see your face. Except you looked awful, like you’d been crying, and then I realized that you were calling me from your apartment, so you’d come home a few days early.

You tried to joke about how terrible the trip had been, how you’d caught a stomach bug from your sister, and how you’d tried, so very hard, to get to know the bunny your parents set you up with, but he’d turned out to be a real jerk. Then you started to tear up again as you talked about the blowout you’d had with your parents. For once I just listened, without cracking any jokes, as it all came tumbling out.

On the one paw, I felt so betrayed that you called me to talk about some other guy you’d apparently been dating, but I also couldn’t believe that you trusted me so much. As miserable as you were, I ached to just hold you and tell you it would be ok. I knew I’d get yelled at for turning in the car late, but it would be worth it.

When Nick arrived, he found Judy, wrapped in a light blue windbreaker, waiting for him at the entrance of her apartment building. He pulled up to the curb and Judy hopped in. Nick flashed her a devilish grin as she buckled her seatbelt, but she could only manage a weak smile in return. Nick pulled her in for a quick hug as he asked, “Where to, sweetheart?”

“Anywhere… just drive.” Judy clung to him for several moments before reluctantly pulling away as he let go of her and put his paws back on the wheel.

“You look awful, what’s wrong Carrots? Still sick? You better keep your bunny germs to yourself.” Nick relaxed as she chuckled and shook her head. “No promises,” she said as he pulled into the street and drove towards the freeway.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Judy shiver and hug herself tightly. Nick turned on the heater as they lazily made their way up the onramp to the empty freeway.

“Thanks for coming to talk to me Nick. I just... don’t know where to start.” She trailed off and looked out the window as her ears twitched nervously.

Suddenly Judy shrieked, “Pull over!”

Nick slammed on the brakes and swerved into the shoulder as Judy fumbled with her seat belt.

“What is it?” He barely got the words out before Judy had opened the door and vomited onto the pavement.

A bright light washed over them. Nick glanced back, blinded by the glare, but even so it was obvious a semi truck was coming up fast, a little too far to the right….

Nick screamed, “Judy!” right before the truck clipped the back corner of the patrol car.

 

I was on autopilot when I called in a code 999 to the station after the impact smashed us into the guardrail. I couldn’t believe the radio worked, or that you were still breathing. Luckily you pulled your head back in the car when I yelled, but you weren’t buckled in. That’s the most afraid I’ve ever been, Judy. The look of terror on your face as that truck hit us felt like an icy stab to my heart, leaving me aching even now in a way I've never felt before.

Somehow Chief Bogo beat us to the hospital. I wanted to stay with you, but Bogo threatened to hold me down while they stitched me up. I reluctantly agreed to stop bleeding all over the place and let them work on me while he went to check on you.

When he finally found me again later in the ER, I remember the look Bogo gave me, a long hard look, as he slowly took off his glasses and put them in his front pocket.

Chapter 2

 

My mom used to say that troubles come in threes. I’m terrified that she might be right.

 

I couldn’t believe how many officers came to the funeral. I’m glad they did, otherwise the service attendance would have been pretty sparse. It was weird seeing everyone out of uniform, especially Chief Bogo. He told me to take as much time off as I needed, considering how rough the past few weeks had been.

I really feel for Bogo. It was bad enough that he had to watch me freak out while he listed all of your injuries: punctured lung, shattered tibias, ulnas, vertebrae, and several other things I can’t even remember, but he said you were stable. I could have cried when he said that last part, but instead I started to make a lame joke about how he could have saved time by telling me which parts of yours weren’t broken. Then I realized he was impatiently waiting to tell me something else, and it obviously wasn’t good news.

My mom’s friend Rita had called headquarters. She didn’t have my number, so it was the only way she could reach me. She’d found Ma when she came over to check on her. My mom was unresponsive, and Rita called an ambulance, but it was too late. I wish you could have met her, Carrots. I know she would have liked you. Maybe not right away, but she would have eventually.

 

“Thanks for coming.” Nick shook Clawhauser’s paw as the cheetah sniffled before pulling Nick into a crushing hug. “Hey careful now, or you’ll pop my stitches,” Nick said, and the cheetah let him go. After an incoherent blubbery farewell, Clawhauser followed the last of the ZPD officers to their cars.

Nick smiled as he heard her walk up behind him. Elephants weren’t known for their stealth, and in spite of her much smaller than average size, Rita was no exception.

“Hi Rita. I’m glad you could make it.” Nick looked down at his feet as she sat on the ground next to him.

“I wouldn’t have missed it, Nick. You and your mom are like family to me,” she said as she wrapped her trunk around his shoulders.

“It’s ok to cry, you know…” she trailed off as Nick turned to look at her through tear filled eyes.

 

Rita was such an amazing part of my life growing up. She’d watch me when Ma worked, and she always treated me like her own son. Just like Ma, Rita didn’t approve of my creative employment history, and disappointing her had been almost as bad as disappointing Ma.

It’s getting harder for me to avoid falling back into the same old patterns, especially on days like today. Before I used to always look for the easy way out of any tough situation, but there’s no shortcut this time.

 

Nick, dressed in a rumpled green hawaiian shirt and brown pants, casually wheeled a pink stroller down the sidewalk. He turned down an alley and made his way to a loading dock, where he waved lazily at a bear pushing a laundry cart before he wrestled the stroller up a short flight of stairs.

Wandering through darkened corridors and rooms stacked with boxes and supplies, Nick rolled the stroller into an open freight elevator. He pushed the fourth floor button and waited expectantly as the doors crashed shut and the elevator whisked him upwards.

 

Things are rough these days, I miss talking with you so much Judy. Sometimes I just want to walk away from it all and give up, like I’ve done so many times before. But I can’t, Carrots. You won’t let me.

 

Nick pushed the stroller down the hospital corridor and paused at the nurses station where a rhino eyed him suspiciously. Nick pulled a box of donuts from the carrying compartment of the stroller and placed it on the counter.

Nick winked at the rhino before speaking. “Here you go, Nurse Ratched, a dozen of Zootopia’s finest. That’s the nice thing about being a cop, we know where to get the best donuts.”

“I told you to stop calling me that, fox,” she bellowed after him as he continued down the hallway. She waited until he was out of sight before she hurried over to look inside the box.

 

It took awhile for your mom to warm up to me. She and your dad rushed to the hospital as soon they heard about the accident. Your dad eventually had to go back to the farm to keep things together there, but your mom refused to leave while you were still recovering.

However, before he left we found out you had a little surprise for all of us. I thought your mom was going to faint and I swear your dad nearly had a heart attack when the doctor told us, but at least I finally understood why you were having such a hard time talking to me that night.

 

Mrs. Hopps sat in a waiting room chair, humming quietly to herself as she crocheted a small pink blanket dotted with bright orange carrots. She looked quizzically at the stroller as Nick barged into the room.

Nick smirked at her. “Well, you know what they say, always be prepared. Besides, I had to go do something. Waiting around here would have driven me insane. Any word yet?”

Mrs. Hopps shook her head. “Still another hour before we’ll know anything.”

“How many times has Mr. Hopps called since I left?” Nick asked as he slumped down in a chair across from her.

Mrs. Hopps chuckled. “Only four… no wait, five times.”

“Can I get you anything?” Nick started to stand again, but Mrs. Hopps shook her head vigorously and motioned for him to sit. “No dear, I’m fine.” Nick settled back into the chair and stared vacantly at the clock on the wall as she continued working on the blanket.

The minutes ticked by glacially as Nick alternated between

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