interested.

 

“Who, me?” Baloo blushed. “Nah, just looking after him for the day.” He held out his arms for the kid who seemed even eager than him to get away from Sally, but not enough to go into Baloo’s arms, as he kept fidgeting about while he was handed over to him.

 

“Funny,” Sally said, as she handed him over. “The way he squirms reminds me of you on our date.”

 

Baloo blushed fiercely. He held the kid against him, as if for protection from the hunger-filled look that Sally was throwing his way.

 

“Yeah, well… Gotta go!” Baloo tipped his cap respectfully, and made to make a run for it. But Sally was all too ready for that, and grabbed him around his arm.

 

“Say, why don’t we get together and have some lunch?” she suggested. “I know this quaint little family restaurant that do a mean steak, and some cute little children’s menus. It’ll be fun.”

 

“Err, thanks, Sally,” Baloo replied nervously. “Sounds great, but… I really have to get going. I promised Becky I’d have the kid back soon. I wouldn’t want to disappoint her, you know, what with her being my boss and all…”

 

“Well, how about I go with you?” Sally replied. “We could walk the baby home and… “

 

“I came by bike!” Baloo said quickly.

 

“Oh,” Sally said disappointed. “Shame I didn’t bring mine. Oh well… “ She grinned playfully, and stroked Baloo’s chin. “Maybe we could catch up some other time then? How about tonight? There’s this new film showing on at the theatre.”

 

Baloo shivered slightly. “Ummm, I’ll try, Sally… But my schedule’s been really booked up lately. I dunno when my next free night will be.”

 

Sally shrugged. “Well, call me when you have the time.” She leaned over and tickled the baby’s chin. “Bye bye, sweetie,” she cooed at him and then walked away, blowing a kiss at Baloo before she left.

 

Baloo felt a gush of immense relief when she left. “Man, what I wouldn’t give for a radar on her, so I know when to make a runner,” he muttered, and then held up the baby to his face. “Now you, “ he said sternly. “Don’t you ever go wandering off by yourself again, you hear me? You might go and hurt yourself. Nasty boo boo.”

 

The baby cringed his face at Baloo’s baby-talk, but Baloo just put it off to gas.

 

“Now, why don’t we go finish our walk then?” Baloo tucked the kid under his arm, and followed the sidewalk.

 

Karnage cursed in his mind. That darn Sally, or whatever her name was, had foiled his escape. She had found him crawling through the grass and picked him up before he could make a break for it. He had tried shouting at her, ordering her to put him down, but all that had come out was gurgles and baby noises. He could barely get a word out. It was like being at the dentist, with his mouth all gone numb.

 

There was nothing for it. It was beneath his dignity as a captain and a pirate, and went against his very nature, but try as he might… For the second time that day, he was unable to stop what was coming…

 

“WAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 

Baloo jumped slightly in surprise, as the baby began to bawl and screech, waving its little arms about furiously.

 

“There, there,” Baloo tried to soothe the infant. “Whats-a-matter?”

 

Baloo bundled the baby up in his arms, cuddling him. He tried calming him by pulling the usual funny faces and silly noises, but to no avail. He checked the baby’s diaper, but found that he was clean. He reached into the baby’s bag that Rebecca had given him before leaving, and brought a bottle to the baby’s lips, but he just pushed it away.

 

Baloo checked around him, checking to see if there was anything nearby that might have upset him, but could find nothing amiss.

 

‘Maybe meeting Sally messed the kid up worse than I thought?’ he thought.

 

“Awww, come on, kid,” Baloo near pleaded with him. “Give your unca Balooie a break, huh? Look, if you want another dance and song, then sorry, but I can’t give you one just yet, not here. How bout I give you an I.O.U for later?”

 

The baby instead grabbed Baloo’s lower lip and pulled it with all his might. Small as he was, he was strong for a baby.

 

Baloo yelped, and rubbed his lip. But he just grinned at the kid, laughing. “Quite the little scrapper ain’t you, little fellow?”

 

Karnage grew angry. He had been known to reduce his enemies to tears, bringing the mightiest of men to their knees, pleading for mercy. And now here he was, being coddled for pulling a man’s lip??? This was unacceptable!

 

Karnage flew into a rage, hitting Baloo’s face furiously, though he might as well have been an ant stamping on the foot of an elephant, for all the good that it did. He wailed and bawled, screeching so loud that people from all around looked on in interest.

 

Baloo was beginning to get annoyed. “Okay now, kid!” Baloo said sternly. “Hush up now, you hear me?”

 

Karnage took no notice, and just continued his onslaught of childish fits.

 

Baloo continued to attempt calming him down, but after a while it soon became clear that that was not going to happen.

 

“All right, kid,” Baloo said in a final-tone. “You asked for it.”

 

Before Karnage could even think to figure out what he meant by that, Baloo lifted him up, turned him around, and lowered him onto his knee. Karnage squealed and battered his arms and legs about, but to no avail. Baloo had one big hand over him, holding him secure so as not to let him fall, while the other one…

 

[SMACK!]

 

Karnage yelped, as he felt his bottom get spanked from behind, and immediately broke out into a fresh wave of cries. It was not really painful, just slightly more than a tap, but for some reason, Don Karnage could no longer control his own tears, as he cried hysterically.

 

“You’re a naughty, naughty, naughty boy,” Baloo disciplined Karnage, as he spanked him.

 

If Karnage still had his own voice, he would be cursing some hefty strong words right about now.

 

‘As God is my... OW!” Karnage yelped. “… I swear by the… OW!… I will have my… OW!… revenge, OW!”

 

After a few minutes, Karnage finally managed to get his fits of tears under control, and once he was silent, Baloo ceased the punishment and lifted him back up.

 

“There now,” he cooed at him. “That’s much better. Good boy!”

 

Karnage only cringed his face at him, and imagined happy thoughts like being at his full size again with his sword, and shoving it right through Baloo’s stomach.

 

Baloo rubbed his back, as an attempt to soothe him, or at least keep him calm. He didn’t want a fresh batch of tears to crop up anytime soon.

 

“Okay, Baby Britches,” Baloo carried him. “Let’s get going. We have somewhere else we need to be right now. If we hurry, we just might make it.”

 

Karnage cringed his little mouth. The title ‘Baby Britches’ was really starting to tick him and his diaper off. He briefly wondered where they were going now? But since he couldn’t ask, he just sighed and kept quiet, as Baloo carried him away.

 

They walked through the park for several more minutes until they came out at the other end where the shops were… Across the other side of the street, outside the park, was a jewellery store.

 

Karnage looked up in wonder. Perhaps this was the client that was supplying the gems that Baloo was transporting… Maybe this wouldn’t be such a bad wish after all.

 

Karnage kept all quiet and peaceful, as Baloo walked across the street. His eyes glittered, as they approached the jewellery store, getting closer to the door.

 

But then, just as they were near the door… Baloo made a sharp turn to the left, and ended up heading into the building next door instead.

 

“Wha…?” Karnage tried to say, but instead all that came out was, “Waa.”

 

Baloo patted his head. “Hold on, Baby Britches. Tis will all be over ina wittle while.”

 

Karnage shuddered furiously. He didn’t know what was worse… Getting bounced about like a ragdoll, or listening to Baloo’s baby-waby talk.

 

Baloo walked into the building, but Karnage hadn’t been concentrating on it, so he hadn’t seen what the company was. They went into reception, and as Karnage observed his surroundings, he noticed that there were a lot of people there with children, most of them babies.

 

‘Oh lord, have mercy,’ Karnage pleaded with the almighty. ‘Don’t let Baloo be taking me to nursery school?’

 

“Yo, excuse me?” Baloo asked the girl at reception, a Yorkshire terrier with glasses and a lisp. “Baloo, appointment at 1200?”

 

The lady skimmed down her list shortly. “Ah, yes.

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