his nose made him want to sneeze. He tried everything to suppress it - holding his breath, clamping his mouth shut, even pinching his nose, but nothing worked. The sneeze would not be denied.

“Ah-ah-ah-ah-CHOO!”

All of the feathers that Baloo had held were blown away by the force of his powerful sneeze. The sound of the sneeze seemed to echo forever. He, scared to death, sat as still as a statue, his frightened eyes riveted to the nomad camp. Rebecca continued to pick up feathers as if nothing unusual had happened.

Silence.

Baloo breathed an enormous sigh of relief.

Then there came a savage whoop that made Baloo’s heart leap into his throat.

“Ah!” Baloo yelped as an arrow sliced through the crown of his hat, barely missing his head; he could feel the arrow’s shaft against his scalp. The big bear, moving faster than he ever had in his life, scrambled to his feet and bodily snatched up Rebecca, who was still leisurely gathering feathers.

“Hey! What are you doing, Baloo? We don't have enough feathers! Put me down this instant!” Rebecca said irately.

Baloo instantly complied, saying, "Just tryin' ta save our skins, lady! Make like a birdy an' fly!" He noisily splashed across the river, making a beeline for the Sea Duck.

Peeved, Rebecca knelt to pick up a feather that Baloo had made her drop. While she was kneeling, three arrows skimmed unnoticed over her head. When an arrow bounced off her pith helmet with a dull ‘twang’, Rebecca looked behind her, screaming, “Ah! Nomads!” She, clutching an armful of the precious feathers, soon caught up with Baloo, who was making fast tracks across the desert.

About twenty nomad men, armed with bows and a seemingly endless supply of arrows, mounted their trusty ostriches, and came thundering after them, whooping. A large cloud of dust resembling a sandstorm billowed in their wake.

End of part 1

Easy Money the Hard Way
part 2
or
a novelization of “The Bigger They Are, The Louder They Oink”
Written by: Jeremy Cushner

Disclaimer:TaleSpin and its characters are the property of Disney. No money is being made from this novelization. A few scenes were added for flow purposes.

Author’s note: This episode is one of my favorites. You probably guessed that. Otherwise, why would I go to all the trouble to novelize it? This is a madcap, action-packed episode from beginning to end. That’s what makes it so fun. I have nothing but sincere admiration for the writer as well as for all of the TaleSpin writers. What an awesome show!

I want to personally thank Gidget for all of her suggestions and support. I also want extend a really big thank you to my sister for putting up with me, a crazed TS junkie. THANK YOU :o) And I also want thank you, the reader, for taking time to read this.

Watoosi
Rickie Lake

All was calm and peaceful. Filmy stratus clouds were suspended, seemingly motionless, over the arid Afrikkan country of Watoosi. The harsh, late afternoon sunlight glinted off of the lake, which was as smooth as glass. Not even the hot breeze whistling around the gigantic granite rocks ruffled the placid water.

Floating on the lake was an orange-trimmed yellow Conwing L-16 cargo plane. This foreign object incited curiosity among the animal inhabitants of this desert land. Three birds cawed to each other about it as they flew overhead. A striped blue lizard sunning himself on a rock next to the lake gazed at the shiny seaplane. Between mouthfuls of mosquitoes, he languidly wondered what it was and how it got there.

Feeling a vibration deep from within the earth, the lizard uttered a guttural croak of alarm and slid into the water where it was safe. The vibration grew stronger. It was now accompanied by a low rumbling sound, which became louder by the second.

East of the lake, an overweight grey bear and a petite brown bearess came into view. They were running as if their lives depended on it - which it did.

Running at full tilt, Baloo glanced over his shoulder at the nomads who were pursuing them. Don’t they ever give up? he asked himself. He hadn’t run this much since...since...well, never. His racing heart pounded in his ears and his side ached, not to mention the rest of his tired body. It wasn’t fair. The nomads were riding on indefatigable ostriches while they had to use their own legs. To make matters worse, his tootsies were getting scorched by the hot sand.

“This is all your fault, Baloo!” Rebecca puffed, becoming more miffed each time a very rare, very valuable ostrich feather escaped from her grasp. And after all the trouble that they had gone through just to get this many!

“Myfault?” Baloo gasped out incredulously.

“Yes! If you hadn’t sneezed the nomads wouldn’t have known we were there!”

Baloo mustered up just enough energy to glare at her. “If youhadn’t gotten this nutsy notion we wouldn’t be here in the first place, Rebecca!”

“Hmpf! Well, if you...”

Because the two bears had slowed down during their argument, the distance between them and their pursuers decreased. The arrows that the nomads shot came dangerously close to hitting their targets.

“Run! Run!” Baloo frantically told his boss. He got his second wind when he spied the Sea Duck over the crest of the sand dune. The big bear put on a burst of speed, his aching legs pumping as fast as they would go.

I don’t care what that fat bear says, she thought, seething with indignation. This is still his fault! Ruining my perfectly good plan...eep! An arrow had sliced one of the feathers she was cradling in her arms in two. Rebecca picked up the pace, panting breathlessly, “I’m running! I’m running!”

Chasing them were Watoosian nomad warriors, who were determined to capture or kill the outsiders who had dared to trespass on their land. They were an awesome and fearsome sight to behold as they thundered across the desert, their maroon capes billowing out behind them, a cloud of dust and sand in their wake. Even though they had kept up the same frantic pace for nearly forty-five minutes, neither the nomads nor the ostriches showed the slightest sign of weariness. The ostriches kept on running, and the nomads kept on peppering the two intruders with arrows.

To Baloo’s and Rebecca’s relief, they finally reached the lake.

Baloo, sensing that his boss’s energy was flagging, scooped her up in one arm, her legs still pumping from sheer adrenaline. He sloshed through the waist-deep water to the plane.

Rebecca gave one backwards glance at their relentless pursuers, glad that they were almost home free.

“In! In!” Baloo said frantically as he flung open the starboard door and bodily tossed Rebecca into the cockpit. He quickly scrambled in after her.

“I’m inning! I’m inning!” she replied, leaning out of the cockpit to retrieve a feather that had escaped from the plane.

Baloo pulled her back in and slammed the door shut a split second before it was impaled by six arrows.

“Fly! Fly!” Rebecca shouted. She sat in the co-pilot’s seat, clutching what was left of her feathers and anxiously watching the approaching nomads.

“I’m tryin’! I’m tryin’!” With lightning speed and unerring accuracy, Baloo flipped switches. “C’mon, baby.”

With twin puffs of smoke, the engines roared to life. Baloo increased the throttle and taxied the seaplane across the lake. The nomads continued to fire arrows at the plane. Most fell short of their target, but a few lodged in the starboard pontoon.

The leader of the nomads made one last attempt to capture the intruders. As the Sea Duck began its ascent into the sky, he lassoed the starboard pontoon and was immediately lifted into the air with the plane. Looking down, he saw that he was very high up. It was painfully obvious that he couldn’t stop this yellow beast with his bare hands and a few arrows. He could only do one thing - let go. And so he did. As he plummeted into the lake, he yelled, “Aieeee! Yannuuu!” Translated it meant: “This is gonna hurt!”

The pontoon with the nomad’s rope still encircling it partially separated from the strut. The forward end dangled perilously as the seaplane soared over Watoosi.

In the Sea Duck’s cockpit, Rebecca counted her recovered booty. “...ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen. Oh, if we’d only gotten a few thousand, I’d have made a fortune selling them.” She shook the sand out of the feathers and smoothed them out. After all, fourteen feathers were fourteen feathers.

“A few thousand?” Baloo plucked the arrow from his cap and tossed the arrow aside. He shoved his cap on his head, scowling. “We almost got out tails tattooed for this much, Rebecca. You an’ your moneymakin’ ideas.”

Rebecca crossed her arms, averring, “I’m an entrepreneur with good moneymaking sense.”

“More like nonsense,” Baloo retorted, yanking an arrow from the console. He angrily tossed it to the floor. “Your schemes never work. I tried to tell you before about the nomads, but no you knew better!”

“I know business, Baloo,” she countered. “Supply and demand. Cause and effect. I’m tenacious and clearheaded.”

The business jargon didn’t impress Baloo. “No, you’re stubborn and pigheaded and won’t admit when you’re wrong.”

“Ha! I would, too. I’m just never wrong.”

At that infuriating statement, Baloo’s face darkened. He clenched the control yoke with both hands until the knuckles showed white. He knew that there was something wrong with the plane, because he had to struggle to keep it steady. He figured that it was all of the arrows stuck in the pontoon.

Rebecca continued brightly, “You watch. My next idea will make millions. I guarantee it.”

“Next idea?” Baloo cried, astonished

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