Holding On

By Cowgirl645

Prologue

He didn’t want to leave her there, but he didn’t have a choice. The hundreds of miles of wilderness he called home were just not the… best place to keep a small baby. There were too many dangers. Cougars, wolves, rouge and savage Indians. That was just the beginning. Ever since her mother died, he couldn’t feed her. She had gone for two days without eating, and she wouldn’t have survived if he hadn’t given her to them.

Percy walked away from the Calvary, his tears making tiny potholes for the ants and other insects crawling around on the sandy desert path. Percy didn’t dare look back for fear of losing too much water. He wiped his eyes with his sleeves, making the many heat waves ahead of him look like the river. His long blonde hair fell in his face, but he didn’t bother to brush it away. Pictures of Danni kept filling his mind, bringing more tears to his eyes. He was almost glad for those memories; he didn’t know when, or if, he would see Danni again.

A scorpion shuffled past his shoe, but he ignored it and kept walking. Most of the animals here would be dangerous to an infant, right? Percy tried to reassure himself, but he had a hard time. He hoped that he wouldn’t feel like this for long. He hated this feeling. Ever since that fire in the schoolhouse, he always had a hard time moving on. He hated to admit it to himself, but he often turned to moving around, making sure he never grew attached to anything. First the schoolhouse, then his wife, and now Danni. Percy made a vow that day: he would never get attached to anyone; the pain was just too much to bear.

Chapter one

Percy poked at the small fire absent-mindedly as he gazed at the stars. His eyes started to droop, and he let out a long yawn. He usually didn’t stay up this late, but he just couldn’t sleep. Maybe it was eerie silence that loomed around him. It wasn’t this quiet most of the time. Or maybe it was the memory.

Starting at sunset that evening, it was exactly ten years since he had given Danni away. He gently wiped away a small tear from his eye. At least he knew she was safe. She wasn’t in danger of some famished predator or intense and violent Indians, or the any of the other dangers of travelling like this. No, she was safe at the Calvary, probably sleeping now. When she woke up, she’d go off, maybe feed the horses or help the Colonel with something.

Percy sighed. He often wondered what she looked like. Only seeing her when she was two wasn’t a great reference to guessing what she looked like now. He imagined her having blonde hair, maybe green eyes like her mother’s. A few more tears came out at the thought of his deceased wife, but he forced himself to go back to thoughts about Danni’s appearance. He finished her off with a beautiful dress and a bow. Percy smiled in satisfaction, but that happy moment was soon replaced with sorrow. He had a hard time remembering Danni’s face, no matter how much he tried to grasp at it.

Oh, how he wished he could visit her. But with all of his travels, he hardly came over the same patch of grass; if he did it was a complete coincidence. He just couldn’t remember where that Calvary was, after all, he’d only been there once, and that was ten years ago. Percy exhaled deeply through his nose, frustrated about this memory loss.

Percy kicked some loose dirt over the fire, making the flames dwindle and reduce in size. Once the fire was out, he laid down with his back against a tree. He wanted to stay up longer, but he wanted to sleep at the same time. He wanted the depressing thoughts to go away, and sleeping would help, but who was to say that sleeping wouldn’t cause some nasty nightmares? His eyelids threatening to clamp shut, and his yawns becoming more frequent, he decided to try to sleep. He made himself comfortable on the ground; sleeping outside all these years had made him accustomed to these hard resting places.

Most of Percy’s dreams weren’t that bad, but tonight his dream was almost unbearable.

He was in the dark; the only light was a few stars peeping out from the clouds covering the moon and the rest of the stars. He was searching for firewood, but had a hard as it had just rained an hour ago. A deafening roar pierced the night air, and Percy tried to run back to the fire, but something grabbed his arm, holding him in place. He tried to turn around and attack this intruder, but in his dream he couldn’t move his head. A terrified shriek came from the campsite. Percy’s heart attempted to thump out of his chest. He tried pulling away, but his handler had an iron grip.

Then, complete silence. Only the sound of rustling leaves. The clasp on his arm released, and he sprinted towards the campsite. The whole site was destroyed. The tent he had put up was shredded by what looked like claw marks. Steam rose from the extinguished fire where the tin pitcher of water he kept had been knocked over; a large dent was placed in the side. But none of that mattered at the moment.

Hannah and Danni were gone. Just gone. He searched the whole area, but there was no sign of them. Percy had more tears coming down. He thought he had lost them for sure. He scolded himself. This was why he was always a soloist; there was always too big a chance of losing dear ones. He kicked a pile of leaves, scattering them around. A few wet leaves landed on his jacket, but he didn’t wipe them off. He looked at the tops of the trees, searching for a flicker of hope. And a flicker of hope was given.

A soft wail coming from up above sounded, and Percy looked upward to see a small infant. Overjoyed, he ran to the tiny Danni in the tree branch. He gently picked her up and cradled her, keeping his eyes in constant search, but he couldn’t find Hannah. He tried calling out to her, but no one answered. Not even the chirping of the birds or the rustling leaves in the trees. Percy bit his lip to keep himself from crying, but it was no use. He turned away, and the real Percy woke up.

Percy woke up with a start, his hand clutching his chest. He tried to calm himself down. He hated that exaggerated dream version of that dreaded day. Once calmed down, he sighed. He doused out what was left from the small fire. Percy didn’t want to go back to sleep, mostly because of these nightmares that kept haunting him every night. And the fact that the sun would rise in about half an hour. Percy didn’t want to just sit there; he needed something else other than bad memories racing around in his mind.

Rustling leaves. Perfect excuse. Percy listened carefully as he walked towards the sound. He didn’t usually come towards sounds like these; they almost always turned out to be hungry animals. But this time there was an exception. The sounds grew louder as Percy silently drew closer. Something made a stomping noise, and the rustles stopped. Percy pulled back some bushes standing in his path. Bad move. A shrill squeal sounded, then a large thud, and Percy went black.

Alano’s nostrils quivered nervously as he sniffed the human. It was pale looking, with a purple splotch growing on its forehead. It looked dead, but Alano couldn’t be sure. He played with the creature’s light mane, at least that’s what it looked like to Alano. The creature didn’t even flinch. Alano put his head up looked around, backed away slowly. The leaves crunched under his hooves, sending shivers down his back. He hated the loud sounds that came from the leaves, it was too easy to hear. That’s probably how this human found me.I didn’t mean to hurt it! He looked around again.My master would not be pleased. Alano did a quick search around. Satifyed with the silence, he started to trot away.

The multicolored leaves were thrown up into the air as Alano steadily built up his speed to a canter. He enjoyed taking in the forest’s beauty. Leaves of all shades of reds, oranges, and yellows fluttered around on the air’s current without a care in the world. Once down, the winds picked them up again, blowing them into Alano’s dark brown mess of a mane. Alano shook his head, moving his forelock out of its usual place in front of his eyes.

A lower branch scraped his back, adding to the numerous scars on his brown coat. Another thing he hated about the forest. If a predator ever chased him, he couldn’t run full speed to get away. Thankfully, no enemies had gone after him, but he had a feeling that it would happen any day now. Who knows, he thought, Maybe the creature was a warning. Maybe I should go back to the plains.

He sighed. He hated the outside plains. None of those horses wanted him. They never understood him; and he didn’t understand them. Now, because of this lack of communication, he had been shunned from all herds. The worst shunning was with a fairly large herd of horses, led by this lightly colored horse. Once Alano’s difference had been noted to the herd, he was ignored. Alano figured the herd had taken a vote or something, but after a few minutes, the stallion started making threatning positions. A pale colored palimino tugged on on the stallion’s mane, but he ignored her. He started to charge Alano, until a pinto blocked the way in front of him. The stallion had then stopped and tried to look behind the stuborn pinto, but she refused to move. She started yelling at the dun stallion in a