Toby Part 13: Healing of a Heart
“Why you obnoxious, pig-breathed, dirty-minded…!”
A yellow-tan husky shrank back across the porch under an ongoing string of furious adjectives. “Hey wait a minute, Trix…” he pleaded, but he was cut off by a snarl.
Trixie, a purebred girl husky with just a hint of blue in her fur, continued her berserk tirade. “Why don’t you just call me ‘Ditzie’ now, since you seem to think that’s all I am! Pete, you’re nothing but a stuck-up jerk.”
“Aw, c’mon,” Pete pleaded. “All I meant was…”
“I know what you were driving at!” she snapped. “And here’s what I’m driving at: GOODBYE!” And she stepped through the pet flap, going into her house.
‘Girls,’ thought Pete. He stuck his nose in, hoping to make one last appeal, but the flap suddenly slammed down with the force of a small sledgehammer.
“I said, get lost!” she yelled.
Defeated, Pete withdrew his muzzle and walked away. In the few seconds it took to reach the steps, a small stream of blood began to flow from his left nostril. “Girls,” he grumbled bitterly. “You say one little thing and they blow up.”
It was the end of another relationship for Pete, which was nothing unusual. He had been dating Trixie for two days – which was actually rather exceptional for him, having never in the past managed to break the one-day line. “Ah, who cares?” he spat. “There are loads of other girls. All I gotta do is find someone else.”
As he walked away, he ran through all the girl dogs he knew of in
“Are you alright?” asked a voice.
Pete lifted his head to see a very attractive husky coming in his direction. She was slender and shapely, with soft brown fur covering most of her body while white came up from her belly to cover her face. A pair of brown patches around her eyes gave a mysterious, daring appearance. “Oh dear, you’re bleeding!” she exclaimed, seeing the blood coming out of his nose.
Pete shook his head and cleared his throat. “Ah, I’m OK,” he replied, wiping a paw across his nose. “I got hit in the face earlier. No big deal.”
She still looked concerned. “Are you sure you’re alright?”
Pete nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Well, good.”
“I’m Pete,” he introduced himself, flashing a second-rate charming smile.
“Delilah,” she replied.
Pete tried to connect the name. Nobody he knew, which was hopeful. It did ring a bell from somewhere though. A promising bell. “Hey, Delilah, you wouldn’t happen to…” he began, but was stopped by a bark from around the corner.
“Oh, excuse me,” Delilah apologized. Turning her head, she called over her shoulder, “I’m over here, hon.”
A large gray Malamute trotted around the corner. “What’s going on?” he asked.
“Oh, he just bumped his head, honey,” Delilah explained. “Pete, this is my mate, Matt. Matt, this is Pete.”
“Nice to meet you, Pete,” Matt nodded. Apparently he noticed the blood as well, for he asked, “Are you OK?”
Pete scowled. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he repeated tersely as he walked away.
Matt and Delilah stared at each other. “What’s his problem?” wondered Matt.
Delilah shrugged. “Beats me. He wasn’t like that a second ago.”
‘Figures,’ Pete thought. ‘Meet an attractive dame and she’s already taken.’
As he wandered the streets of
As if bidden by his very thoughts, Pete spotted something out of the corner of his eye. He stopped and took a step back, angling his head for a peek into the back yard. Yes, there it was at the corner of a fence. A crude wooden cross about three feet high, undecayed despite the harsh weather it had endured in the outdoors for… the husky sighed. For a long time.
Something inside told him to go over to it, but he held back. The yard seemed deserted, but he had come to regard it much as a French soldier might regard the battlefield of
‘Ah, what’ve I got to be scared of?’ he asked himself, his haughty attitude suppressed but still very much alive. ‘I’ve got as much right to go in as… as she does. Heck, I’ve got more.’
Looking back and forth and into every shadow as if expecting an ambush, he walked up to the marker. “Hi Dad,” he half-whispered. “Long time no see, huh?”
He knew this was crazy. Only crazy dogs talked to graves. But who else could he talk to? Who else would listen? It never even crossed his mind that he had not five minutes ago been holding his father as one of those accused for his present misery. Of all the creatures in the world there were only two whom he honored: his master, and his father, and both of them only intermittently.
“I met a nice girl a couple days ago,” he went on. “We went on a date, and…” he stopped. Who was he kidding? He’d lied to lots of dogs, but try as he might he could never lie to his father. Not even when his father was long gone. “Ah, who am I kidding?” he asked. “She dumped me, just like they always do. Every time I try to get a girl, they’re not interested.”
His mind flashed at random to all the times he had seen Toby and Luna out on walks, exchanging smiles, nuzzles, and so forth. His eyes darkened. “Why is it that the mutts get it easy?” he asked the ground. “We purebreds have to work for what we get, but the mixed-breeds have everything go their way.”
As he spoke, his consciousness seemed to drift back to a time years ago, when he looked up instead of down to talk to his father. He was a puppy, and he had tripped and hurt his paw while trying to imitate his father’s run.
“I don’t get it Dad,” he sobbed, partly from pain but mostly from frustration and embarrassment. “I did just what you did, I…”
His father gently laid a paw on his head. “Son, I’ve told you before, you need to grow more before you can do the things I do.”
“But I’m a husky,” he whined. “I know about dog breeds and all, and I’m a purebred just like you. So why can’t I run like you can?”
Yukon shook his head forlornly. “It’s not breed that matters. Being a well-bred pedigree doesn’t mean half as much as having your heart in your work. A good sled dog focuses on his mission, and on those he’s running for – thinking of others instead of himself. Remember that.”
Pete’s eyes, which had been bordering on misty, turned to an evil storm-cloud countenance. “You wouldn’t understand,” he grumbled at the ground. “You had Mom handed to you without even asking.” His scowl deepened. “And then she went and played around with that southern mutt.”
“You’re wrong, Pete,” came a voice behind him, “On both counts.”
Pete’s head whipped around in surprise to find Terry standing there behind him. Her slightly dropped eyebrows and barely ticked-back ears spoke of sorrow, although Pete read it as a stern expression. “Oh, hi,” he uttered, spitting it more than saying it. “And just what are you doing here?”
She sighed. “Well, honey, you’re not the only one who comes out here sometimes.” She sat next to him and stared at the crude wooden cross for a long moment. “I heard you say I was ‘handed over’ to
Pete snorted. “The lady bought both of you, locked the pet flaps so you couldn’t get out unless she took you on walks…”
She shook her head. “All that really meant was that we were indoor dogs living in the same house.”
Pete rolled his eyes. “But still, the lady practically gave you to him.”
Terry considered this. “If you want to look at it that way, maybe,” she agreed, “But there was more to it than that.
Pete shook his head. “And then you dropped Dad and went straight for the first mutt to come along once he was out of the way.”
Terry quietly sighed. ‘Here we go again,’ she thought. “He wasn’t ‘out of the way,’ and I didn’t ‘go straight for’ anyone,” she replied. “I didn’t even know Rex existed until weeks after your father was gone, and even when we first met we were just friends for a long time before I considered anything past that. When we finally did discuss the possibility of something more, I actually turned him down at first because of
“Yadda, yadda,” Pete muttered. “You’ve played this record before, Mom. You flipped for him because you knew deep down it was love. Now enough with the fairy tales already.”
Terry clicked her tongue. “Pete, I know it’s hard for you to handle even after all these years. Whether you want to believe me or not, I still miss him every time I think about him. But he’s not here anymore, which is something we both need to deal with. And I’ve told you lots of times that if there’s any way I can help – and no, I’m not leaving Rex,” she added before he could open his mouth. “But if there’s anything I can do to help, just tell me what it is.”
Under ordinary circumstances, Pete would have ended the conversation there with some nasty quip about, “Then get yourself and your fairy tales out of my life.” This time, however, something different came out. “Okay then,” he replied. “Tell me how to get a girl who actually wants me.”
Terry blinked. Why should he ask her that? Granted, she knew how to be won over, but she didn’t really know how to win someone over. Never in her life had she taken an aggressive or pursuing role in a relationship. This was the sort of question for a dad, or… ‘What am I thinking?’ she wondered. ‘He’ll never listen to an idea like that.’
He already doesn’t listen, answered a voice inside. You’ve got nothing to lose.
Taking a deep breath, she decided to risk it. “I’m afraid I can’t help you much directly on that,” she admitted, “But I can give you a little advice. One: be sensitive. It’s not just about you, it’s about her too.”
Pete snorted. ‘Same old lecture,’ he thought. “And what’s the other shoe? I know you’re just waiting to drop it.”
Terry took a deep breath. “Talk to an expert,” she replied. “Ask Toby.”
This was too much for Pete. “Oh, please!” he snapped. “You want me to go to him for tips on dealing with girls? That mixed breed has only dated one!”
“Who is now the mother of his pups,” she pointed out, “Meaning it’s pretty obvious he knows something about…”
“Stuff it,” he spat, turning away. “I’ve had enough of you trying to make me accept that mutt runt, so get it straight: he may be your pup, but he ain’t my brother.” And with that he walked away.
Terry sighed and watched with her ears back and her tail down as her son left. A silent tear formed in the corner of her eye, slid down her face to her jaw, and hung there for a moment before falling into snow that absorbed it with neither splash nor sound.
You did the right thing, the voice consoled.
‘Yes,’ she thought in reply. ‘Yes I did. So why do I feel so bad?’
Pete walked back to his house, as disgusted as if he’d ever been. She actually wanted him, a dog above even other purebreds, to ask for help from some two-bit mixed breed?
“It’s not breed that matters. Being a well-bred pedigree doesn’t mean half as much as having your heart in your work.”
He snorted, all but spitting on the voice of his father’s memory. “Heart in my work,” he grumbled. “What’ve I been doing all these years if I wasn’t ‘putting my heart in it?’”
“Now you’re talking to yourself.”
Pete jerked his head up, looked around, and his eyes narrowed. Toby was staring at him, his expression a mix of distrust and mild curiosity. Faced with his half-brother, Pete felt a strong wave of contempt well up within him. ‘Why did I save him?’ he wondered. “Get lost, mutt,” he spat. “What are you doing here anyway?”
Toby’s head jerked back. No matter how much he came to expect it, Pete’s attitude never ceased to put him off. “If you must know,” he replied stiffly, “I was on my way to visit Luna and the kids. Sorry to bother you.” And he turned and trotted off, his demeanor as charming as an indignant skunk.
“Hey, runt,” Pete called.
Toby turned, his mouth set in a firm line and his eyebrows arched with irritation. “That’s not my name.”
Pete scowled, although for once it was more at himself than at Toby. ‘I hate my mouth,’ he thought. But why should he care what the mutt’s name was? He was a runt, after all. Why he was even talking to him he couldn’t imagine, but unbidden it came out, “Look, Toby, I need some help.”
The blusky snorted. “Well good luck with that.”
“Rrrgh,” growled Pete. Much as he hated to ask for help, he had never been a dog to take no for an answer. “Look, I’ve got a problem and Mom told me to talk to you about it, OK?”
Toby’s expression changed from disdain to a mix of worry and indignation. ‘What does he take me for?’ he wondered. “I think the cold has frozen your brain,” he snapped. And so saying, he ran the remainder of the way to Luna’s house with Pete in pursuit.
“Ah, come on,” Pete persisted. “I’m your half-brother, aren’t I?”
Toby spared him one last look, his eyebrows bent downward like a drawn bow under the burden of a lifetime of distrust for the husky. Ordinarily he probably would have been delighted at the chance to help Pete. But the nasty names, together with the hold-up to seeing Luna and the pups, had ill effected his disposition. “So?” he asked. “Cain and Abel were full brothers. Look what happened to them.” And so saying, he slid through the pet flap and let it close behind him with a decisive thump.
“Who was that outside?” asked Luna.
Toby scowled. “Pete,” he replied.
Luna’s ears twitched. “Pete?” she echoed.
Arrow’s ears pricked up. “Uncle Pete?” she inquired. She had taken an interest in Pete’s doings since the events a few days past, which you will know about if you have read A Time For Miracles, and had expressed hopes that maybe he would turn nice. “Did he come to say sorry?”
Toby shook his head as he lay down facing Luna and the puppies. “Nah, he was up to one of his goofy schemes again. Had some nutty story about Mom telling him to ask me for help.”
Luna gave him a look. “And you told him no.”
Toby shrugged. “Well, duh. He’s gotta be up to something if he comes to me with a story like that.”
Arrow tilted her head. “But Dad, you always say to help other people. Like Charlie, or that wolf cub, or me, or…”
“This is different,” Toby interrupted, secretly irritated that Arrow had proven such an apt student when it came to kindness. “Pete doesn’t have a decent bone in his body, or an outgoing hair in his hide. He could be under six feet of ice in a frozen river and he’d be too stuck-up to ask for help. Besides,” he threw in as an afterthought, “He was the reason Loki needed my help in the first place.”
“But…”
Luna cleared her throat. “Arrow, why don’t you let me talk to Toby alone for a minute?”
“Sure Mom,” Arrow nodded, and trundled off to some other part of the house.
Toby gave Luna a look. “OK, what’s on your mind?”
Luna frowned, apparently deep in thought. “I don’t know,” she replied. “Call me crazy, but I don’t think Pete’s got the brains to come up with anything like that story. Or if he did, it would have crossed his mind that you’d go to Terry and ask her.” Toby briefly felt guilty for not thinking of that himself. “Is he still out there?”
Toby trotted over to the window. “Yep, still on the porch,” he replied. “Huh, like he thinks I’m going to buy his story.” He looked back at his mate to find her apparently deep in thought. “What?”
“Well,” she replied, “What if it’s not just a story? I wouldn’t be too surprised if your Mom did send him to you for advice.”
He snorted. “Oh, come on, she’s not a lunatic.”
Luna shook her head and nudged one of the puppies closer to her stomach. “After she had you, that’s debatable. But I wouldn’t put it past her to do anything she thought might make you two stop fighting.”
Toby hated to admit it, but she had a point. “Well, even if it’s true, why help him?” he asked. “After all the trouble he’s made for us, it’s about time he had to handle the real world.”
The look on Luna’s face instantly made him feel guilty. “Is that what you really think?” she challenged.
He shrugged. “Well, yeah,” he admitted.
Luna shook her head. “Well if that’s the case, maybe I should have picked a different dog. Because you’re not talking like the Toby I know.”
“Luna!” he burst out. “You’re not saying I should help him, are you?”
She clicked her tongue. “Well, think it over for yourself,” she replied. “He did save your life, so in a way you owe him. And if nothing else, now’s as good a time as any to return the favor and get the debt off your back.”
Toby stared at her. “You sound different than usual.”
“Maybe I’ve learned a few things about the way your mom probably thinks,” she replied, not meeting his gaze. Instead, she stared down into the basket at the pups. Sensing Toby following her gaze, she asked him, “What would you do if they could see you and hear you? What would you do if Pete were one of them?”
Toby hadn’t thought of this. He was determined to be a good father, the best in
Toby reluctantly stepped out. “Alright, now what do you want?”
Inwardly, Pete was fuming. Why did he need help from some mixed-breed, especially this one? Consoling himself with the thought of rubbing it in Terry’s face when her idea failed, he coughed slightly and answered, “I must be crazy asking you, but I need help getting a girl.”
Toby shook his head. “Pete, even Cupid wouldn’t stand a chance of hooking you up.”
Pete started to fire back a vicious retort, but somehow didn’t have the heart to bring it out. “Look, can you drop the wisecracks and throw me a bone?”
Toby clicked his tongue as his ears slid back and his tail drooped. ‘I really, really don’t want to do this,’ he thought. He paused a moment and called up mental images of Luna, Arrow, and his parents. It helped a little. Not much, but enough. “Alright,” he agreed. “I’ll help if I can, but only on one condition. You-”
“I’ll stop giving you grief,” Pete assured him. His word was easy enough to give; he might even keep it. “You and your girl… I mean mate.”
The blusky shook his head. “I wasn’t going to say that,” he replied. “I don’t care how you treat me, although you know I’d kill you if you did anything to hurt Luna. But all I’m going to ask is that you try to be a decent uncle to my pups.” He paused for a moment, and out of almost-habit he stuck his paw forward leaving a pawprint between them. “Deal?”
Pete knew nothing about the wolf custom of overlapping pawprints to signify a contract, but after a moment he nodded. “Deal.”
The following morning, or what passed for morning in the sunless winters of
“Well,” Pete explained, “It was pretty run-of-the-mill. I saw her, asked her out, she said yes.”
“Huh,” Toby muttered. “Just like that?”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
‘Recipe for disaster,’ Toby mentally noted. ‘Starting too quick.’ “So then what happened?”
Pete groaned. “Well, we were together for about two days when-”
“Two?” Toby interrupted with one ear and one eyebrow raised. “Are you sure you’re telling the truth on that?”
Pete growled. “Very funny. Yes, it was two days, and I felt pretty good about that.”
Toby had to admit that holding onto a girl for two days was quite an accomplishment considering Pete’s track record. “Then what happened?”
“Well, I made one little remark and she went sky-high.”
Toby’s ears perked a notch. “What exactly did you say to her?”
Pete shrugged. “Something like, ‘You know, we’ve been going for two days solid. We’re practically mates.’”
Toby’s ears, jaw, and tail all abruptly met the floor. When he finally spoke, it was in a quiet groan with one paw laid across his eyes in a gesture of utter hopelessness. “I think I found your problem.”
“What?”
Toby shook his head. “Pete, you don’t just say something like that to a girl you barely know.”
“We’d been dating for two days,” Pete defended himself.
“Which is good for you,” Toby countered, trying to tone his words as gently as possible. It wasn’t easy. “But not so great all things considered.”
Pete rolled his eyes. “OK, so watch what I say. Is that it?”
Toby shook his head. “Not by a long shot,” he answered. “Your whole problem, I think, is that you don’t take it seriously enough. Relationships are more than just finding some girl to kiss and stuff. It’s gotta be from the heart.”
Pete snorted. “That how you caught yours?” he asked.
“It wasn’t like that,” Toby replied. “I didn’t ‘catch’ Luna. You might as well say she caught me.”
“Is that so?” asked Pete, bemused. “Good for you then, fish.”
Toby rolled his eyes to the ceiling. “Heaven help us,” he muttered. “The point is, you have to think. Why are you going into this?”
Pete shrugged. “I want a hot girl.”
“OK, red flag,” Toby replied, praying like he’d never prayed before that this would be the only time he had to go through this. “Relationships can’t be just about making yourself happy. And girls aren’t there just for you to drool over. You have to put something into it to make it work.”
Now it was Pete’s turn to roll his eyes. “You sound just like Mom.”
“I should,” he retorted. “She’s my mom too, isn’t she?”
“Don’t remind me.”
“Hey, you said you’d be nice,” Toby protested.
“Yeah, but that was before you said I didn’t have to.”
Toby groaned, making a mental note that Pete really needed to learn about keeping his word. “Okay, back to the point,” he persevered. “The point is that if you are going to try to find a girl just because you want one, I can’t help you. Now, are you willing to be serious about this or not?”
Pete nodded. His posture didn’t show much indication of submission, but Toby wasn’t sure if this was bad acting or simply Pete’s habit of refusing to submit. “OK,” he conceded.
“Right. Now this girl, what did you like about her besides the fact that she tolerated you for two whole days?”
Pete shrugged, knowing that if he said what immediately came to mind Toby would give him up for a lost cause. “Well, she was nice.”
“Nice how?” Toby pressed.
Pete’s face wrinkled slightly. “I dunno, there was just… something different about her. Most girls…” he trailed off, his bitterness reasserting itself. “Gah, why should I tell you what most girls treat me like?” he wondered aloud.
Toby was struggling not to explode. “Well for starters,” he pointed out, “You came to me for help. And I can’t help you much unless you supply me with some information. And second,” he added, trying not to smirk, “I know how most girls treat you. I saw Luna kick your butt that time she had amnesia, remember?”
Pete’s expression made it all too clear that Toby has touched a nerve. “Most girls don’t beat me up,” he retorted. “Most of them just tell me off the first time I do or say something they don’t like. Always the same – they blow up over the littlest thing.”
Trying to ignore the fact that Pete’s definition of “the littlest thing” wasn’t a match for Webster’s, Toby took it in. He had a feeling what the husky said about girls’ sensitivity was, in all probability, a bit exaggerated; that some girls probably put up with Pete for a while and only blew up when the dam broke. Luna had said as much about her experience with him. “So this Trixie girl is different, huh?”
Pete nodded. “Yeah. She was kinda touchy, and she made a stink about a lot of things I said, but when she did she was nice about it. She never even talked loud until I made the mate remark.”
Privately, Toby was thinking this girl sounded too good for Pete. “So what exactly do you want to do?” he asked.
“I want her back,” he replied.
Toby clicked his tongue. ‘Somehow, I was afraid of that.’
Two days of lessons later, Toby was having serious doubts of ever changing Pete. He could sense motivation, although whether Pete was reluctant to take instruction was far beyond a question. Not only that, but Toby had the uneasy feeling Pete wasn’t learning anything but pickup lines. The third day, though, resolved any question when Pete showed up with a black eye and a blacker disposition.
“What happened?” asked Toby.
“You don’t want to know,” muttered Pete.
“Yes I do,” insisted Toby.
“No you don’t.”
“Yes I do.”
“No you…”
“Pete, I want to know what happened.”
“OK,” Pete conceded, rolling his eyes.
“That’s better.”
“Then I don’t want to tell you.”
Toby got a sneaking suspicion. “Pete,” he asked, “did you try to talk to a girl?”
Pete rolled his good eye. “Trixie,” he muttered. “I wanted to see if all your tips would work, so I tried to say hi and…”
Toby groaned. “Pete…” he began.
Pete cut him off. “What if you talk to her for me? You know, soften her up a little.”
Toby tried to imagine Luna’s reaction if he showed up with a black eye. “I think we should wait until you’ve made some improvement.”
Pete persisted. “Just tell her I’m trying to change, OK?”
Toby shook his head. “Pete, think about how that’s going to come across to her.” He changed his voice into a dorky falsetto. “‘Hey, Trixie, I just wanted to tell you that the guy who suggested you be mates wants you to wait and not date any more guys while I make a decent dog out of him.’”
Pete shrugged. “Yeah, but you’re good at making stuff like that sound nice. You can come up with something, right?”
Toby’s ears drooped. “I probably could,” he confessed, “but I really think it’s a bad idea. Especially if you’ve been after her lately.”
“That’s why I want you to do it. I can’t get her to give me a chance. Maybe you can.”
Toby tolled his eyes heavenward. “Why me?” he muttered aloud.
“Because you’re the only one who can,” was Pete’s for once reasonable answer.
Toby sighed. “Alright,” he agreed. “I’ll try, but only once. If she’s not interested, I’m not talking to her about you again. At all. Deal?”
Pete nodded and slapped a paw down in the snow. “Deal,” he agreed, lifting it away to show a print.
Toby raised an eyebrow. ‘I didn’t teach him that,’ he thought.
Toby went to the address Pete gave him and found a simple house like most of the others in
After a moment, a dog slipped outside. Slender, well-groomed, with an unusual blue tint to her fur and white on her face and underbelly. Definitely Trixie. He had only ever seen a tint like that on two other dogs, and she certainly wasn’t either of them. She didn’t seem to notice him standing on the opposite corner as she walked to the side of her porch and dug at a patch of snow. Mildly curious, Toby trotted up behind her and watched as she disinterred a well-chewed, meatless T-bone.
“Hey,” he greeted.
She jumped and turned around. “Who are you?!” she demanded, her voice quivering.
Toby took a step back. Why was she so jumpy? “My name’s Toby,” he replied gently. “Sorry if I scared you.”
Trixie calmed down. “Oh,” she heaved a sigh of relief. “I thought you were him.”
Toby decided not to ask who this him was. “Are you Trixie?”
She eyed him warily. “Yeah, that’s my name.”
“Well listen, I wanted to talk to you about…”
“Sorry,” she snapped, turning around. “You seem nice enough, but I’m through with guys.”
“What?” asked Toby before her words fitted themselves together in his head. “No no no, I’m not looking for a girl. I’m already settled down.”
At this she seemed to brighten. “Oh. Well in that case, how can I help you?”
He took a deep breath. Her first thought had been to say he knew a guy who was interested in her, and then ease into it. But her comment precluded that possibility. So, perhaps not all that wisely, he ventured, “You know a guy named Pete?”
The effect was instantaneous. Her eyes darkened and her fur rose. “Don’t… even… mention… that… creep.”
“Wait a minute, Trixie.” Toby’s forced calmness began to falter like a pilot whose engine has gone out as he goes into a nosedive. “Just hear me out. He’s trying to change, he just…”
“Trying to change?” she asked angrily. “Trying to change? I tried to change that sorry excuse for a dog. I’ve tried to change a lot of guys, and he is the worst.”
“I know, but he’s not what he seems. He just…”
“Get out of here,” she insisted. “Now.”
Toby had been around Luna enough to know when a woman was on the brink. “I’m going, I’m going.” And he left, wondering how Pete would respond to notice of a failed mission.
“She said no?” Pete asked. His tone was definitely one of aggression.
“I tried,” Toby admitted, “but she wouldn’t give me a chance. The minute I mentioned your name, she lost it.”
“You must have said it wrong,” insisted Pete.
“I just asked if she knew you, that was all it took.”
“You should’ve said something else.”
“Like what?”
For a moment it seemed like Toby had won the argument. Pete stuttered, trying to think of an answer. “Like… like… I don’t know. That’s your job! You sweet-talk Luna all the time.”
“Yeah, well, she doesn’t blow her top every time she hears my name. And she loves me.”
“Well, I love Trixie.”
“Pete, I’m still not sure you get what it really means to love someone. You’ve got the concept, but not the heart of it.”
Pete rolled his eyes. “OK then, Cupid, where do we go from here?”
“I think we should just wait it out until she’s had some time to cool down and you’ve had some time to improve more. I still don’t know how we’ll get her to realize you’re different, but we’ll have to play that by ear.” Secretly, Toby was hoping that in the meanwhile they would find a less hostile girl for Pete. But he knew better than to say it out loud. In any event, both of them were suddenly distracted by something coming up the road.
The something was three dogs, walking in a line as if trailing a dragnet over a lake. The middle dog was a light brown and white husky with a red bandanna draped about his neck. Toby recognized him as Officer Ewan, one of his father’s co-workers, and another as Exile from the police force’s reserved sled team. Of the three, Exile wore the bitterest expression.
The three stopped in front of Toby and Pete. “Are you Pete?” asked Ewan.
Pete cleared his throat uneasily. “Yeah, that’s me.”
The husky did not look at all happy to hear it. “Officer Ewan,” he introduced himself. “You’ll have to come with me.” Turning to Toby, he added, “You too.”
“What?!” asked both dogs in unison.
“Wait a minute,” asked Pete, “are you arresting us?”
Ewan shook his head. “No, nobody’s under arrest,” he replied, turning around as the other two fanned out to positions behind Toby and Pete. “At least not yet. But you have both been called in for questioning on a certain matter.”
“What kind of matter?” asked Toby.
Ewan shook his head. “I’m sorry, but I can’t divulge that at the moment, for purposes of discretion.”
“What was that last bit?” Pete whispered to Toby.
“I’m not allowed to tell you at the moment because it’s a situation that could be awkward for you if word got around,” answered Ewan without turning his head. “And don’t act as if I can’t hear you.”
Toby shook his head. “I should have told you, Ewan’s the best officer they’ve got. Nothing gets by him.”
“What about your dad?” muttered Pete.
“I’m not quite sure if chief counts as an officer or not,” Toby admitted.
Ewan led them two blocks to a place Toby knew very well. Unfortunately, so did Pete.
“You brought us to the old mu-” Pete stopped at a warning look from Toby and Ewan. “Uh,” he gulped. “Why here?”
“You will find out soon enough. Toby, he has asked to see you first. Pete, you will remain out here until you are called.”
Toby didn’t know what to make of the odd turn of events, but he entered. There sat the lone figure of a bloodhound by the fire, his baggy jowls, lowered head, and motionless tail all speaking of a very grave demeanor. His manner was in some ways rather like Sherlock Holmes sitting in a chair, waiting to deliver bad news to a client.
“Hi Dad,” Toby greeted, trying to sound light and carefree. It wasn’t easy. Rex’s posture brought Toby back to many times when he’d been scolded as a puppy for disobeying one or both of his parents.
“Son,” Rex uttered. It was more an acknowledgment than a greeting.
Toby gulped. “Uh, what’s going on?”
Rex sighed, and his voice lightened a notch. “Well, Toby, that’s what I’m hoping you can tell me. I received a complaint earlier concerning you and Pete, and I was hoping you could shed some light on the matter.”
“A complaint?” asked Toby, completely bewildered. “For what?”
“About two hours ago, a female came to us complaining of a husky who had been harassing her since she broke up with him last week. She identified him by name as Pete and added that you had been assisting him by conveying messages from him to her.”
Toby nodded. “Well yeah, I know I did that, but I didn’t think I was harassing her. I was just trying to help Pete.”
Rex nodded. “All things considered, that’s quite commendable. But she says she made it very clear she wanted nothing to do with Pete and you persisted regardless.”
Toby paused to consider his words. “I just want to do the right thing.”
Rex nodded slowly. “Please, tell me what happened.”
So Toby went over the events of the past few days: Pete’s request, his agreement to help, the training sessions, and the conversation he’d had with Trixie. When he finished, he added, “I think Pete really does care about her, Dad. Or at least he wants to, but just doesn’t know how.”
Rex remained as still as if he’d been carved from stone, finally saying, “Please go outside and tell Officer Ewan to send Pete in for questioning. Do not tell Pete anything of the nature of this matter.”
Toby obediently turned and headed out the pet flap. He knew why Rex wanted his silence on the matter. It was a common practice for police to minimize discussion between witnesses so as not to enable them to collaborate any false stories.
Ewan spoke before Toby had even come out all the way. “Pete, you’re next.”
Pete looked at Toby uneasily. “What’d he want?” he asked.
Toby looked at the ground. “I can’t tell you.”
“Why not?”
“Police protocol,” Ewan answered for Toby. “Now come along, the chief is waiting.”
As Pete entered, it was a far different experience than Toby’s had been. Toby had been there many times before, and he knew that under the stern police-dog countenance was a kind and loving father. For Pete, this was all but an enemy court, and Rex the hanging judge.
“Heyah, uh… chief?” Pete offered weakly.
Rex simply stared at him, his eyes a potently neutral expression. “Do you know why you are here?” he asked.
Pete shook his head. “Look, I haven’t robbed the butcher’s since I left the gang, honest. I…”
“This isn’t about a theft,” Rex replied. “You’ve been charged with harassment, as well as recruiting a bystander in unlawful behavior.”
Pete’s face twisted into a baffled expression. “Can you put that in English?”
“Your ex-girlfriend wants you to back off.”
“But…” Pete pleaded, but was cut off by a grim look from Rex. At least he perceived it as grim, though it might have been something else.
“Just tell me what happened,” Rex instructed.
“Well,” Pete began, “I met this Trixie chick, and she and I went out for a bit. Then I said something Toby says I shouldn’t have and she blew up at me. I talked to Mom, who said I should talk to Toby, and I managed to get him to help me out.”
Rex blinked at the mention of Terry, but resumed his poker face. “Go on,” he ordered.
“Well, I got Toby to give me some pointers and then went to see if I could get her back. She told me to go pick a fight with a wolverine, so I asked Toby to see if he could soften her up. And then that Ewok husky outside came and said you wanted to talk to me and Toby, and now here I am.”
Rex shook his head, deciding not to correct Pete about Ewan’s name. “Pete, Miss Trixie asked that you leave her alone. That should have been enough.”
“Yeah, but I wanted another chance. That’s all I was asking for.”
Rex remained silent for what felt like an eternity, and as he did so Pete realized the irony of discussing second chances with a dog he’d never even given a chance. “But,” he admitted, “maybe I don’t deserve it.”
Rex shook his head. “I assume you realize I can’t go easy on you just because you’re Terry’s son,” he said.
Pete saw an opening. “Why not?” he asked. “Mom would want you to.”
“Your mother understands that I have a duty to
Toby entered, followed by the officer. The two of them took their places beside Pete.
“I have reached a decision,” announced Rex. “Pete, Toby, because of your behavior you will share the same sentence: restraining order. Neither of you is to go near Trixie or her home at any time or for any reason. If you do, either of you, you will be punished accordingly.”
“But…” Pete protested.
“That is all,” Rex cut him off. “You may go.”
“Wait a minute,” demanded Pete, “I’m just asking for-”
Toby grabbed him by the collar and yanked hard, cutting off the rest of the words. “Pete, you’ll be asking for trouble if you keep at it. Now let’s go.”
“Oh, and Peter,” Rex added, “The next time you choose to bother a girl, don’t pick the daughter of one of my officers.”
“What?” Pete asked, even as Toby and Ewan ushered him out the door.
It was a tense meeting the two dogs held outside after Ewan and his fellow officers had left. “What was that stuff about an officer’s daughter?” asked Pete.
Toby shrugged uneasily. “I noticed a resemblance between Trixie and Exile,” he confessed, “but I never really knew until now.”
“I can’t believe you,” growled Pete. “You should have told me. You shoulda stood up for me.”
“I couldn’t,” Toby replied. “Dad’s right. Sexual harassment is against the law. You broke the law, and I helped you. That’s all there is to it.”
“I did it for Trixie!” Pete protested. “Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”
Toby sighed. Heaven only knew how far he had gone in the past – how far he would go if asked – for Luna or their pups. But that was no excuse. “I’m sorry, Pete” he replied, “But there’s nothing either of us can do but accept this for what it is. I’ll help you find another girl if you want, but…”
“You know what?” Pete snapped. “Just forget it. I don’t want your help anymore, so just get out of my life.” And with that he turned and stormed away.
“Pete…” Toby called, but that was all he got out before his brother whirled around and hurled himself at Toby like a runaway tank. Toby fell sprawling in the snow, and as his brother stood over him with his teeth clenched Toby briefly wondered if Pete meant to kill him.
“I said get lost,” Pete growled, getting off of him with plain contempt. “Lousy mutt.”
Terry sat next to Alicia’s chair by the fire, enjoying the feeling of the woman’s hand running through the fur atop her head. She let out a contented sigh and tilted her head to guide the hand toward an itchy spot behind her left ear. A spell of peace and contentment seemed to rest on them both…
CRASH!
… until a splintering sound from behind the house shattered the spell like a shotgun blast through a glass plate.
“What in the world?!” cried Alicia as she rose to her feet. Grabbing a poker from the rack by the fireplace, she dashed to the back door and flung it wide with a bang.
A sight of sheer madness greeted them. The cross marking Yukon’s grave, a memorial which had survived year after year of brutal weather, had been ripped from its moorings and was now in the mouth of a furious dog, who appeared to be intent on tearing it to pieces. With a vicious snap of his neck, the dog flung the cross sideways and tore it in two.
“Bad dog!” screamed Alicia, running at the dog and waving the poker (which is a very foolhardy thing to do). Fortunately for her, the dog dropped the cross and ran off into the night with a parting snarl.
Alicia dropped the weapon and fell to her knees in the snow, staring in disbelieving grief at the splintered remains. After a moment, tears began to well in her eyes. “How could this happen?” she sobbed as the falling snow soaked her nightgown. “Why would…” but the rest of her sentence was lost in sobbing.
Terry stared in the direction of the vandal’s departure, as devastated as her mistress. “Why, Pete?” she whispered.
If Pete had even heard his mother’s question, he wouldn’t have known how to answer. He felt no better; indeed, he was angrier than before. Not overtly angry at himself for what he had done, but at the world in general. Angry at Rex for the restraining order, Toby for not being a good enough teacher, and his own father for never having been there to teach him himself. He hated everyone, and he was convinced everyone hated him.
It was only when he passed close to Trixie’s house that he remembered the situation he was in. As if to emphasize, there was Trixie talking to another girl dog – her cousin, if Pete remembered correctly. Acting quickly, he ducked out of sight.
To this day even Pete cannot say for certain what thoughts were in the wild mix swirling in his mind as he listened.
“He is such a jerk,” Trixie was saying, “But then I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Every guy I date is like that.”
“Aw, come on, cuz,” urged the other girl. “You’ll find the right boy eventually.”
“No I won’t,” retorted Trixie. “I’m through with guys, through with everything. No matter what I do, I just feel like everyone I meet wants to use me somehow.”
Trixie’s cousin shook her head. “You’re talking crazy, girl. Listen, go home and get a good night’s sleep. Think it over.”
Trixie sighed. “O-okay.” She turned and left. Pete followed at a distance, so many things shooting through his mind that he wasn’t sure of up from down. Finally he stopped where he was and watched her disappear.
It was only then that it dawned on him, Trixie wasn’t heading for home.
‘Oh, man,’ he thought. He started after her, then realized he would need some help. Instantly his eyes shot to the only place he had any hope of getting it from.
Toby sighed as the flames crackled in the hearth, warming the fur of his back. What could he do? He had tried everything, and all he had unearthed was failure. Granted, at least now Trixie would be free of Pete’s advances, but was this the cost? He had failed. Failed a dog who, for the first time in his life, he had actually felt a connection to. A brother. His brother.
A banging sound snapped him out of his thoughts as the pet door flew open with such momentum that it slammed against the door itself. Pete came stumbling in, panting furiously. “Toby!” he barked.
Toby groaned. “What now?”
“Bro, I need your help.”
Toby looked at him incredulously. “What’s this ‘bro’ business?” he asked. “And since when do you…?”
“Look, I’ll do whatever you want, but you’ve gotta help me. Trixie’s run away, and I’m pretty sure I know where she’s going. I think she might…”
Toby cut him off. “Wherever she is, we can’t follow. Dad said…”
“I know what Dad said!” snapped Pete, not even realizing what he had just called Rex. “But this is important, and there’s no time! I’m going to go after her before it’s too late, and I need you to get your old man and any of his officers you can, and tell them to follow me.”
Toby stared at Pete as if he had sprouted antlers. “Pete, this is crazy. You’re going to violate a direct order from my dad, and you want me to go and tell him where to find you?”
“Toby, I know where Trixie went. And if she’s there for the reason I think she is, we don’t have much time. Now are you going to help me or not?”
Toby’s mind flashed back to Luna’s words. “What would you do if they could see and hear you right now?”
“I don’t want my puppies to have a criminal for a father,” he excused.
Pete was almost at the end of his wits, but he knew he had one last card to play. “How about a coward?” he challenged.
Toby’s features hardened. The gauntlet had been cast. He looked Pete in the eye and said, “Tell me where you’ll be.”
“He’s really gone too far this time,” Rex growled.
“Rex, I’m sure there’s a reason,” pleaded Terry. “There’s got to be something we can do to help him. I know you’re a police dog, and I said the day we agreed to be mates that I would respect your duty, but doesn’t family mean anything to you?”
Rex hung his head. “Sweetheart, I want to help Pete, but you know my duty. I’ll go easy on him if I can, but this kind of behavior cannot go unpunished. Trespassing, defacing a grave marker, and…”
The pet flap flew open and in tumbled Toby, going so fast he could barely stay on his paws. “Dad!” he yelled.
“Toby!” cried his parents in unison. “What are you doing here?”
Toby shook the snow from his fur. “Dad, it’s Pete. He went after Trixie, and he sent me to tell you…”
“Went after Trixie?!” exclaimed Rex. “But I told him not to…”
“Dad,” Toby blurted, cutting off his father for the first time in his life, “I told him too, but it’s urgent. He said to get any officers you can round up and come after him.”
Rex stared at Toby in a daze and turned to Terry. “Someday, these boys are going to be the end of me,” he muttered. He returned his gaze to Toby. “Alright, show me where he went.”
Pete raced through the winter night, heart hammering in his chest. He had found tracks which he assumed were from a dog, most likely Trixie. The tracks didn’t matter. He knew deep down that she had gone this way. He could feel it in his gut. ‘Come on, come on,’ he mentally abused himself, willing his feet to go faster. He was heading for a place he had been only once…
“So this is where you like to hang out, huh?” Pete asked, not terribly interested in the scenery.
“It’s great, isn’t it?” asked Trixie, staring down at the ten-foot drop, bottoming out in a foaming cauldron of frigid black water. Only the constant movement had prevented ice from forming, leaving the churning waves to shine in the moonlight. “So much power in such a small pool.”
“Yeah, I guess,” Pete replied. He said so only to humor Trixie; in truth, he found the place boring. Then an idea came to him. “Hey, check this out.” He spun sideways and began to canter along the very edge of the bank.
“Pete, look out, you could…!” But before she could finish, the ground crumbled under Pete’s feet and he fell, only catching himself just in time with his front paws. Hastily, Trixie grabbed his collar and hauled him back up. “You are such a macho,” she told him. “If you fell in there, you’d probably freeze to death if you didn’t drown first.”
Pete shook himself and laughed, trying to shake off the unease of his close encounter with the grim reaper. “Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he grumbled.
“I’m serious,” she told him. “If you fall in there, you’ll never be seen again.”
‘If she’s going there now, I’m gonna kill her,’ he thought. ‘And if she ain’t, I’ll kill her for making me go out of my way.’
He entered a copse of pine trees and made a beeline for the place. “Trixie!” he called. “Trixie…!” Throwing himself through a tangle of bushes, he stopped. There she was, right at the edge, staring back at him.
“Leave me alone,” she groaned, her voice choked with tears.
“Listen,” he pleaded, “Just let me…”
“Go away!” she yelled. “You just won’t change. You or any of the other boys I’ve tried to change, and you never do.”
vTrixie…” he pleaded, “I just wanted… oh, never mind what I wanted, just don’t do it.”
She sniffled. “Don’t do what?” she asked.
Pete stuttered. “Uh, well, I uh… I kinda figured you came here to kill yourself.”
She snorted. “Don’t flatter yourself,” she snapped. “I just came here to get away from you.”
Pete groaned inwardly and took a step toward her. “Look, I know we got off bad, but…”
“Go away!” she yelled. “Just leave me alone! You guys are dirt, all of you! Now get away or I’ll…”
The rest of her sentence ended in a scream as the bank crumbled beneath her and she fell head over paws into the foaming water.
“Trixie!” screamed Pete, rushing to the water’s edge. He didn’t even slow down, just ran out into space and hurled himself into the swirling cauldron.
The water was even colder than he had imagined, drenching his fur in an instant and wrapping his body like the very cloak of death. Worse, it was impossible to tell or control where he was going. A powerful downcurrent dragged him across the stone bottom, then swept upward and flung him against a small boulder. Over and under, back and forth, like a mouse in a washer filled with rocks and lined with sandpaper. There was no escape, no chance of grabbing hold of anything. Pete’s mind became filled with one absolute certainty.
He was going to die.
Rex was panting hard as he ran behind his son. Despite the biting cold, he felt unnaturally warm as his muscles strained to keep up. “How you ever talked me into this, I’ll never know!” he shouted.
“That makes two of us,” Toby called back. “But we must be closing in; the tracks are getting clearer by the minute!”
“And you’re sure Pete wasn’t up to anything untoward?”
Toby would have shaken his head, but he didn’t want to break stride. “At this point, I’m not sure of anything,” he replied. “I just know he seemed desperate, which to me says he was up to either something really good, or really bad.”
“Any indication which it was?”
“I’d like to say really good, but after what you told me about his dad’s grave marker, I couldn’t even guess.”
“I sincerely hope it was the first,” Rex panted. “I’m going to have a hard time keeping Exile away from his neck after this one.”
Pete felt himself floating. The water had grown quiet, but his surroundings were pitch-black. He choked, gasped, and spat up a stomachful of water. At least he could breathe now. But the rocks, the beating, the near-drowning had all taken their toll. As blood leaked through several places on his body where the skin was gashed or rubbed raw, he could feel his life ebbing away.
Suddenly he became aware of another presence in the cave. A huddled figure lay in a corner, shaking.
“Trix…ie?” groaned Pete.
Trixie lifted her head and whimpered. “What do you want?” she scarcely more than squeaked.
“Look…” Pete groaned, “I…”
A splashing sound came from behind them and another dog came up out of the water. “Thought I’d find you two in here,” came a familiar baritone.
“Rex?” asked Pete.
“How did you find us?” asked Trixie.
“I have my ways,” he replied, shaking the water from his fur. “Is anyone hurt?”
“I’m… very cold,” Trixie couldn’t help whining. “And I can’t move my paw. Every time I try it hurts really bad.”
‘Thanks to me,’ Pete thought, wracked with guilt.
“What about you, Pete?” asked Rex. Pete was surprised to hear that the older dog sounded genuinely concerned.
“Ah, just a few scratches,” Pete boasted, trying to rise to his feet before collapsing from sheer exhaustion.
“Sit tight,” Rex ordered. “Miss Trixie, can you walk?”
Trixie reluctantly rose to her feet, her right paw held aloft. “Not too bad,” she replied through her teeth.“Alright. Pete, do you think you can swim?”
Pete shook his head. “I don’t think so.”
“Alright,” Rex said. “You’re in worse condition, so I’ll get you out of here and then come back for you, Miss.”
“But what about the rapids?” protested the girl. “You’ll never get out alive.”
Rex shook a few more stubborn drops from his fur. “As I said, I have my ways. Now, come on, Pete.”
Surprised that he had the strength to do it, Pete staggered to his feet. “You think I can make it?” he groaned.
Rex moved to his side and steadied him, unintentionally pressing against one of the raw spots. “All things considered, I don’t see how you have a choice. Just hang onto my collar and swim with me as best you can, am I clear?”
Pete nodded and took Rex’s collar in his teeth. “Gotcha,” he nodded.
Rex led him into the water. “I’ll be back, Miss Trixie. Until I return, stay as warm as you can.”
Trixie stared after them anxiously. “Be careful,” she called.
As the water’s surface brushed against their chins, Rex stopped.
“Wh-wh-what’s the holdup?” chattered Pete.
Rex seemed hesitant to speak. “I just want to say, Pete, you did the right thing this time. You were very brave, and from what I heard of your father, he’d be proud.”
Pete was so surprised he almost lost his grip on Rex’s collar. “Whrr…?”
But Rex seemed to have no interest in further conversation. “Brace yourself!” he cried.
And the next thing Pete heard was water in his ears.
Rex maneuvered under the water with surprising skill, paddling through the calm currents at the edge and diving below some of the rougher swells. Pete hung on for dear life, trying not to pass out as blood leaked out to be replaced by icy water seeping in. As some of the frigid liquid flowed through his teeth and into his mouth, he could feel his tongue taking on the nature of a small glacier. ‘Gotta… hang… on…’ he thought desperately.
At last they reached a place downstream where the river had frozen over. “Waiht!” Pete called past his frozen tongue and through the mouthful of collar. He tried to say, “Not the ice, over on the snow or our paws will stick,” but it came out, “Nrrt de ice! Ovhhr on snu, rr puhs schtick!”
Rex nodded and guided them over to a part of the ice that was covered with soft, dry snow. With a desperate heave, he clambered out and pulled Pete after him.“How did you know our paws would stick to ice?” he asked.
Pete panted. “Thumpthing my dad taught me,” he lisped past his frozen tongue.
“Dad! Pete!” came a loud bark. Rex turned his head to see Toby running toward them.
“It’s all right, Toby. He’s a bit beaten, but he is alive,” Rex called. “I’m going back for Trixie now. Stay here and keep Pete warm!”
Toby reached them and hunkered down next to Pete. “You just watch yourself in there,” he warned his dad. “If I tell Mom you drowned, she’ll send me to join you.”
Rex nodded, ran back up the bank to a spot near where the bank had crumbled, and dove back in.
“Y-you know,” Pete chattered as Toby did his best to shield him from the wind, “Your old man is thum dog. You’re lucky tuh have him.”
Toby nodded. “Don’t I know it.”
It was a bleary-eyed man who came to the door, blinking away sleep at the sound of barking and scratching. “Pete,” he groaned, “You’ve got a pet flap, why all the-” he stopped abruptly as he opened the door to find Pete lying on his doorstep more dead than alive. “What the devil?” he blurted out. “Pete, what in the Sam hill have you gotten into?”
With a grumble the pajama-clad man bent down and picked him up, carrying him inside. Muttering a string of questions and comments, he tended the dog’s injuries while Toby listened with rapt attention at the door. Rex had departed as quickly as possible to see Trixie home safely and then get back himself, already sneezing violently.
“And with the vet’s office closed hours ago,” Pete’s owner grumbled. “I just hope you last till morning, boy.”
Toby groaned apprehensively. He hoped Pete would make it, but he sure wasn’t going to take the chance. When all was quiet, he slipped into the darkened house. A fire crackled in the hearth, providing some illumination. “Hey, Pete?” he whispered. A whimper from a pile of blankets by the fire answered him, and he padded over. “How are ya?”
“Practically dead,” came the reply.
“Oh, come on, don’t even talk that way,” Toby groaned. “We’re all rooting for you, even Dad.”
“Rex?” croaked Pete. “That reminds me, what about the sentence?”
Toby shrugged. “I smoothed it over,” he assured him. “He says to consider the sentence suspended.”
Pete sighed. “Might not matter now,” he groaned, his voice sounding like gravel.
“You don’t know the half of it,” Toby replied. “You were out when we brought you here, but I heard your owner as he was fixing you up. If you’re not better fast, he might… you know.”
Pete took a deep breath. “Maybe I deserve it,” he admitted.
Toby was aghast. “Don’t even say that!” he yelled. “Pete, if it weren’t for you I wouldn’t still be alive! Remember Christmas? Heck, remember an hour ago. Without you, Trixie would be dead.”
“You don’t get it,” Pete grumbled. “I’m the reason she was there.”
“Pete,” Toby pleaded, “You’ve gotta hang in there. For Mom, for Dad…” he trailed off for a moment before adding, “For me.”
Pete turned one eye to stare at him. “You for real?” he asked.
Toby nodded. “You may be a jerk sometimes, but I don’t want you to die.”
Pete sighed. “If you really mean that, then tell Trix…ie…” and with that he passed into oblivion.
Toby felt himself begin to weep, uncertain whether Pete had died or just fainted. “Come on, Pete,” he pleaded. “Pull through this, for all of us.”
The next morning, Pete awoke to find his master bent over him. The man placed a hand on his side to feel the steady up and down of his ribs. “Pretty weak,” he murmured. “Maybe you just don’t have enough in you.”
Pete held his silence. He was determined not to let out a whimper, not to show any sign of weakness. If he was going to die, he was going to do it the way he should have lived, with dignity.
“I’m sorry, boy,” his owner whispered, “but I’m afraid I gotta do this.”
He lifted Pete off the floor and took him outside to a corner of the yard. With a determined grunt, he pulled out a pistol and clicked back the hammer. Moonlight glinted off the steel barrel. Straightening his arm, he pointed the weapon at his dog’s head.
“Sorry, boy.”
“Come on!” Toby called to Terry, running for all he was worth. “We’ve gotta see if he’s alright!”\
Despite her age and lack of experience, Terry was only inches behind him. “I just hope we’re not too late,” she panted. Snow flew out behind them as fog puffed out of their open mouths like smoke from racing train engines.
“You and me both, Mom. Now come on, we’re only a block away. We can still…”
BANG!
A gunshot shattered the air. Terry stumbled and fell in the snow as Toby screeched to a halt. “It’s not…” he breathed. But despite the echo, there was no doubt where the shot had come from. Pete’s yard.
“No,” cried Terry, gasping. The tears wasted no time in pouring from her eyes.
“Mom, it’s gotta be a mistake,” Toby insisted. “Pete can’t be dead, he’s…” but he knew the words were empty. He had spoken to the dog last night. What did he have to live for? What pity would his master, a hunter, have on a dog who would survive for maybe a week at best?
“He’s dead,” Terry cried. “Pete… my son…” her words trailed off, and a moment later she let out an agonized howl.
Toby stood stock-still. Never in his life had he felt so powerless, so useless. Not when he had hurt Luna as a puppy, not when he lost the way in the wilderness, not even when Luna went through labor while he was trapped outside. ‘I failed,’ he thought.
‘I tried and tried to give him a chance, and now…’
He turned away. A few weeks before, the thought of never seeing Pete again would have left him dancing for joy. Now he felt that if all the world were made of dog food, and every plant and tree a soup-bone, he’d give it all to see his brother again.
Tail between his legs, Toby all but limped back home. He tried to find something in the whirl of thoughts to grab onto, some thread of hope to ease the pain, but there was no way out, no escape from the accusing voices that jeered inside his heart.
Guilty. Guilty. Guilty.
“He’s dead?!” cried Luna.
Toby nodded weakly. “Mom and I were going to see him, and… and we heard a gunshot.” He hung his head. “Pete’s master was always kinda rough. I think he must have put him down.”
“Uncle Pete’s dead?” asked Arrow. She was usually a tough girl, but there was no missing the catch in her voice.
Toby’s ears drooped towards the floor. “I’m afraid so.”
Luna’s face drooped too. “I can’t believe I’m saying this,” she confessed, “but I really thought he had a chance.”
Toby sank bodily to the floor. “It’s all because of me,” he lamented. “I tried to help him, and look where it got him. If I had just said no, Pete wouldn’t have kept going after Trixie, Trixie wouldn’t have run off, neither one of them would have been hurt, and he…!” his words died away, replaced by a whimper. “It’s my fault.”
Luna spoke softly to him. “You can’t know that,” she reasoned.
“And why not?” he challenged. “Give me one reason this isn’t my fault, just one!”
She thought for a moment. “Well, for all you know Pete could have gotten hurt some other way if you hadn’t helped him. He probably would have kept up the pursuit even if you hadn’t tried to help, so there’s no reason you’re responsible for the accident.”
“Mom’s right,” asserted Arrow. Even through the tears, she managed to be supportive. “You did your best.”
Toby closed his eyes. “Then why do I feel so bad?”
“Because you have a heart,” Luna answered. “A good one, and one that was in the right place. You wanted to see Pete find the same happiness you found. You agreed to help him save Trixie from doing herself in. You gave him something he never could have had on his own. You gave him hope, and even if he’s dead he died a hero.”
“Yeah,” the blusky conceded, “but the point is, he died.”
No one could seem to get through to Toby after that. Luna, Arrow, Terry, and Rex all tried, but to no avail. Even the humans began to see a change in him. He wouldn’t play, wouldn’t go near the sled he and Charlie used for errands, and barely even ate or drank. The doctor looked him over but confessed he could find nothing wrong with him. Terry was especially worried – she had seen a dog act this way once before.
It was weeks before Toby dared to go back. He hated to go anywhere near the place, but he wanted to see if Pete had been given a decent grave. Yuke’s cross had been replaced just a few days after Pete’s rampage, but no one knew about Pete. Toby was pretty sure he knew what had happened, though. Pete’s owner wouldn’t go to the trouble of burying his dog when the ground was still hard. At best he’d put him in a box or something outside and wait until the thaw.
As he crept into the yard, Toby felt the full force of trepidation his late brother had gone through entering Terry’s back yard. Gazing around, he saw no cross, no rock, no sign of digging. The only thing that caught his eye was a box by the corner of the house, just the right size for a dog. He walked over, his entire body made of lead. So it was true. He knew Pete was dead, but the sight of his coffin brought it home afresh, like violently reopening a wound just to pour in salt.
He walked up to the box and sniffed it. Sure enough, it smelled like Pete. “Hey bro,” he choked. He was silent a moment. How did one talk to someone who couldn’t hear anymore? “I just want to say sorry… for everything.” Images passed through his mind, not flashing but shifting through torturously slow. Images of times when he had been cruel to Pete, supposing it justified because Pete himself was so cruel. From little ones, like taunting him over his countless romantic failures, to severe ones like setting him up to fail on the sled team after he himself lost the position. Choking back sobs and blinking back tears, he recounted them to the lifeless corpse in the box. All justification and self-righteousness were gone, replaced by one question: If he had done a better job of being the good guy, would Pete be dead right now?
“Are you with your dad?” he asked. “I hope you are. I want you to at least get something good out of this, because you went down doing the right thing.” He sniffed. “I guess I just came here because… because I wanted to say goodbye.”
“And if I say no?”
Every hair on Toby’s body instantly stood up and saluted. “Pete?!” he squawked.
“Right behind ya. I always wondered if you had something to do with that boot camp Kodi gave me.”
“Pete!” cried Toby, whirling around. He jumped at his brother, laughing and crying all at once. He forced himself to back away when Pete winced. Bandages still adorned his body like a dog half-mummified, and Toby knew from some of the marks that Pete would bear scars for the rest of his life. But he was alive! “How?!”
Pete shrugged, wincing at a pain in his shoulder as he did so. “Agh. I don’t know. The boss was about to blast me when there was another bang somewhere. He jumped, and the gun went off but missed my head. I guess he thought it was some kinda sign thing, cause he didn’t try again.”
“Huh,” Toby huffed. He could see how the second explosion from the gun going off could have been hidden amongst the echoes of the first. “Wonder what it was?”
“Probably just a tree branch blowing,” Pete guessed. Both he and Toby knew this often happened, when sap froze and expanded inside of a limb during cold seasons until the branch exploded entirely. “Whatever it is, I ain’t complaining.”
“Me neither,” laughed Toby. Then something else hit him. “We’ve got to tell Mom about this! I’ll go let her know.” He started to dash off, but Pete stopped him.
“Don’t tell her,” he said with a look of kind-hearted mischief on his face. “I want to see her reaction when she finds out.”
Toby could barely keep from laughing, until a problem hit him. “How will I get her to come here?” he asked.
“Easy, just do the blindfold thing like you did that time with Luna.”
“Gotcha.”
“Toby, what is this?”
“Just follow me, Mom,” Toby urged, tugging gently on the rope. “It’s a surprise.”
She sighed. “I appreciate the thought, but I’m really not in the mood for a surprise right now.”
‘Oh, you will be,’ thought Toby. Beneath his calm exterior, he was positively giddy as he led her into Pete’s yard. Pete gave him a wink as they walked past him. “OK,” he whispered.
Terry shook the cloth from her eyes and looked around. “Toby,” she asked, sounding like she might cry, “Why did you bring me here?”
“Cause I asked him to, really nice.”
Terry jumped and spun around, staring at what she evidently took to be a ghost. “Pete?” she gasped.
Pete didn’t wait for her to come to him. He trotted up to her and rubbed his face in her fur just like a puppy. “Well I ain't the Easter bunny.”
“Pete!” Terry cried, nearly toppling him over in her excitement. Her tears soaked his fur as she threw herself upon him, frantic to assure herself that her son was really back. “You’re alive!”
“Yeah,” he agreed, “but not for long if you don’t gimme some airspace.” Once he got her calmed down, he explained about the shot. “I don’t know how it happened,” he admitted, “But it did.”
“Who cares how it happened?” asked Terry. “All I care about is that you’re okay.”
Pete hung his head. “A couple weeks ago I would’ve thought you were lying,” he confessed. “Mom, I’ve been a jerk.”
“Pete,” she told him, nearly weepng at the sound of that on wonderful word, “Forget about that.”
He let out a sigh. “I just want to say, well…”
Terry cut him off with one of those looks only a mother can give. “Pete,” she told him in as stern a voice as she could muster (meaning it was as cracked as a vase whacked with a baseball bat), “I’ve been waiting years for this, so please don’t spoil it by bringing up the past.”
Pete couldn’t help but laugh, and Toby discovered for the first time that when it was a real laugh, a sincere laugh, Pete’s laughter could sound very nice. “Okay, Mom.”
Toby smirked. “I, uh, hate to interrupt, but I’ve got a question for Pete. How soon will you be up to walking around town again?”
“Eh, maybe two days.”
Toby nodded. “Two days, then,” he decided, “We start lessons again – if you’re ready.”
Pete got that old look on his face again, and Toby would have worried if he hadn’t known that this time Pete’s intentions were for once in the right direction. “Oh, I will be.”
“Are you sure this is gonna work?” asked Pete. He and Toby had already spoken with Rex, and now were facing up to stage two. Ironically, now it was Pete who felt like backing out.
“Trust me,” Toby urged him. “Just remember what I said and talk to her from the heart.” As an afterthought he added, “And try not to give her a heart attack.”
Pete shook his head. “I’ll try that,” he answered. As Toby made himself scarce, Pete walked up to Trixie’s porch and scratched the front door.
“Who is it?” came a voice from within.
Pete cleared his throat. “It’s, uh, me,” he said half-heartedly.
There was a terrified scream as Trixie recognized his voice. “Pete?!”
“Yeah, it’s me.”
“But you’re dead!”
Had he not felt the way he presently did, Pete would have smirked. “Funny, I didn’t know dead dogs could talk.”
Her voice was slightly uncertain as she asked, “What do you want?”
Pete took a deep breath and asked, “Can I come in, just for a second? It’s kinda cold out here.”
Inside the house, Trixie was terrified. Affirmation of Pete’s demise had reached her weeks ago, and the thought of talking to someone dead left her greatly unsettled. “I’m sure you can handle it. Now what is it?”
He swallowed hard. “I just want to say… well, I’m sorry.” It sounded foreign, strange, as if he were speaking in some other language. Human, even. For all he’d gone through lately, the words “I’m sorry” hadn’t come out of his mouth since he was a puppy.
“Sorry for what?” she asked, sounding… what did she sound like? Sad? Confused? Sullen?
“I guess for saying that thing about… you know, us,” he replied. “And for keeping on your case when you told me to back off and all.” There was a long silence. Way too long for Pete.
“Ask her,” hissed a voice from somewhere out of sight.
Pete looked around. “What?” he asked in a loud whisper.
“Remember what I told you,” hissed Toby’s voice again. “You’ve gotta ask her.”
Pete inwardly groaned. He’d been hoping to avoid that part, but here it was. “Trixie,” he began, “Would you… uh, can you… Gah!” he grumbled in frustration. “Will you forgive me?”
There was a long silence again, broken at long last by Trixie’s voice. “Well, not completely, no,” she replied. “I don’t think I could really just forget what a jerk you were.”
‘No, no, no!’ thought Toby from under the porch. ‘This wasn’t how it was supposed to go!’
“But,” she added, “I think I can buy the idea that maybe, just maybe, you really have changed.”
Pete got excited. “You mean we can pick up where we left off?” he asked.
“No,” came the reply. “But we can pick up if you’re willing to go for a blank slate.”
Pete took a deep breath to steady himself and nodded, which was rather silly since she had no way of seeing him. “Deal,” he agreed.
He could actually hear a somewhat shaken smile on Trixie’s face as she said, “Great. Can we talk more tomorrow? I’m feeling a little…”
“Sure,” he replied. “Bye Trixie!”
“Bye Pete.”
Toby watched smiling as Pete walked away. There was a spring in the dog’s step and a wag in his tail that hadn’t been there in all the years Toby had known him. Hadn’t been there, in fact, since his father passed away. Toby could not delve into Pete’s heart and mind, but he could guess the reason. Gone was the pain and emptiness, the taint of bitter hate, the mask of tough-guy indifference. For the first time in his real adult life, he was free.
For it's out of the darkness that we learn to see,
And out of the silence that songs come to be,
And all that we dream of awaits patiently,
There is life.
Pete, Terry, Yukon, Toby, Luna, Arrow, Exile, Rex © Dragon Tamer
Ewan © Kelev
Trixie © Silver Kia
Lyrics of "There is Life" © Walt Disney Pictures
Dedicated to the various people I’ve disagreed with over time (no need to mention names, you know who you are). May we too find reconciliation.
Author’s Note:
It’s been a joy writing the Toby series. My readers, too many to name here, have been very encouraging all this time, and I’ve much enjoyed returning the favor by encouraging and becoming friends with so many of you. But for now Toby, Luna, and all the rest will be hanging up their collars for awhile. Don’t worry, God willing they will be back with more adventures in due time, and with the kids along for the ride. But until that time comes, I will be working on a different series. I hope to bring every bit as much delight with my new endeavor as with the old, and look forward to hearing the feedback to come.
The old, for now, has gone away,
To come again another day.
The new is here, perhaps to stay.
But as it happens, come what may,
I hope you like it anyway.