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A rich girl from P.V moves to Crenshal Heights after her father's job is moved. She finds out though that her life will not be the same where her new home is. She has to go to a poor people school with 'regular' kids! When she attends this school it's worse than she expected. She expected another rich school to attend. Will she make her way through the year? Or will she meet her doom...

Rules:
Follow AS rules
No dating yourself

Skelly:
Name:
Age:
Gender:
Crush:
Boyfriend/Girlfriend:
Personality:
Role:
Looks:

Me:
Name: Brie Massey
Age: 17 years old
Gender: Female
Crush: Jesse
Boyfriend: Brad Warner
Personality: Brie is a very bright and athletic girl. She makes friends mostly but not in this school. Brie is not a very easy person to get along with. She is a little snobby, "of course though that's a given when your rich". Brie is a very bold girl who is very headstrong.
Looks:

May I make a few suggestions for this roleplay?

First off, this plot could use a few tweaks. It's honestly not that interesting of a story. You should really consider adding some sort of conflict to the story because, after all, there really isn't a story if there's no conflict to be resolved.

Second, I highly recommend adding a "history" section to the bio form ("skelly"). Without it, all the characters that join will be flat with no backstory and just random personality traits.

Lastly, in Brie's bio, you mention a Jesse and a Brad. It would be better to leave these out and add in other member's characters later when people have joined. Also, why would Brie already have a boyfriend if she's so new to the school? Is he from her old school then? How did they meet? How long have they been together? Do they have a good relationship or a bad one? (See how many plot holes not having a history section creates?)

One last little note, Brie isn't quite a Mary Sue character, but she is very near to it. She is the basic mold of any rich girl which is quite boring to be honest. You should think about making her more unique and interesting and giving her more flaws than just "snobbiness."

~Black Rose

Not trying to be rude...But Black Rose could you stop making people change their role play?It's kinda rude... Especially for how long they worked on it! And that at least they took their time to make a role play for all of the AU players.

I am not making anyone "change" their role-plays, I am just saying what could be improved. The quality of roleplays on AS has really gone down ever since the Modding changed and there are no longer specific Mods to watch over the RP threads. These types of roleplays would not have been tolerated before, so I will not tolerate them now. And roleplays like this obviously weren't worked on very hard. I am trying to get these members to take some time to create a roleplay that people will enjoy. Also, I am not sure what you mean by AU players? Alternate universe players?

1st off..I meant AS so you can chill out..

2nd....I do not care how it looks but still alot of people keep changing their role plays because of you!

I wasn't freaking out, I was just confused, which happens with typos. If someone needs to chill out here, it is you. If people are changing their roleplays for the better, than I don't see the problem here and I am glad to be the cause of that change.

Also, I won't respond to anything else you have to say here because it is off topic and spamming. If you wish to continue this conversation, PM me. Thanks.