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As a cross product of my recent rediscovery of Road Rovers and my seething hatred for Transformers 2, I came up with this.
In all my life, I never saw myself writing a fan fiction, but this idea was just too good to pass up.
*Road Rovers HQ, July 3, 2011*
Master: Rovers, we have a problem.
Hunter: Alright, what is it? Did Parvo seize control of a nuclear missile silo again?
Master: Worse. Michael Bay is about to release Transformers 3.
Colleen: Well that isn't so bad. Sure the first two were awful, but I think the world can handle another bad movie.
Master: That's where you're wrong, Colleen. At the rate this franchise is going, scientists believe the next one could be so loud, dumb and assaultive, that it could turn whoever watches it's brain into liquid. And judging by all the people who went to see the first two, this could cause disaster on a global scale.
Shag: *whimpering*
Exile: That's awful.
Blitz: I don't see what the problem is. I like these movies.
Hunter: What do we have to do?
Master: You must first penetrate Bay's lair, but be warned, it is protected by mines, turrets and tanks.
Colleen: Isn't that a tad excessive?
Master: You do remember who we're talking about here, right?
Colleen: Oh, yeah.
Master: Next, you must get past his hall of security cameras.
Exile: That's going to be impossible.
Master: Not really. They are constantly shaking, so if anyone were to see the footage, they would have no idea what the hell is going on.
Hunter: This is starting to sound familiar.
Master: Here comes the tricky part. In the next room, gravity is reduced, as to give you all the feeling you were moving in slow motion. This room is also equipped with automated rocket launchers.
Hunter: Wow. That Fios commercial wasn't kidding.
Master: The next room has at least one elite soldier from every brach of the US military.
Blitz: Even Air Force?
Master: Yes.
Exile: But that doesn't make any se... oh, right.
Hunter: I think we've done enough standing around. Let's go. (I refuse use "Let's hit the road, rovers" on account of writing a fanfic has drained my self-esteem enough already.)
TBC
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