Animation Source Forums

Deleted it was horrible XD

Thanks i try not to make mistakes but o well

Well, I haven't got anything to say that hasn't been said, but...
I believe you have two topics on this story. The same story.
I'll double-check, but I'm going to have to delete the other one, savy?

Write on.
-LWf

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Please calm down. (I wish everyone would stop writing in IM language.)

As for your fanfic, it's a great start, but here are my suggestions:
1) Perhaps change from script format to narrative format (paragraphs), but this is not necessary.
2) Add description and try to avoid using *runs*, *thinks* or things like that. If you're staying in script format, you could add little paragraphs of desciption to 'set the scene' before dialogue begins. If you're changing to narrative format, try to incorporate some description among the dialogue, but not in the same paragraph.
3) Grammer. Please try to use good capitalization and punctuation. They make all the difference in the world.

I realize I may not have been over-complimentary, but don't fret. Not everyone will always love your fics. Heck, I've had people flat-out hate my fics sometimes.

Best of luck. Write on.
-LWf

Well said Lone Wolf! I'd have said the same thing.

-deleted by me

This is your first fanfiction right? Well no one does a perfect one their first time. Take Lone Wolf's advice and you'll get better. He's a moderator. It's his job to help you.

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Oh come now. I did not say that your fic was bad in any way.
And what I wrote were not rules. They were suggestions, see:


You don't have to change your fanfic. That's the beauty of being the writer; no one can change the story except you, and only if you want to.
I was only offering my opinion as a fellow writer.
My suggestions were meant to help you; I'm not trying to impose rules.
Yes, there is a "rules" topic by steet, but I think you will agree that they are very loose rules left mostly to common sense.

And, as Brown Wolf said, it's my job to help you and every writer on these forums and this site. I take my job seriously, but the majority of the time the most I do is offer suggestions. I only step in and edit or delete a fanfic in extreme circumstances.

I'm terribly confused as to why you think I hate your fic. I said no such thing and I did not intend to upset you at all.
If I did, I'm very sorry.

As for the wait, I apologize that your fic has not been seen to yet, but pleae be patient. I'm very busy this month, but either I or the other fanfic mods will update the fics very soon.

Best of luck.
Write on.
-LWf

ok then ill follow your rules thanks !