back to reality. He rose to his feet. "Amber, what's wrong?" he asked.
"It's Man," cried Amber.
"Man?" asked Bambi. His eyes widened. Suddenly, a deafening roar was heard.
"Run!" screamed Amber. She pushed Bambi, and he fell over.
The three fawns ran, and several roars were heard behind them.
The roars reached the Great Prince.
"Bambi!" The Great Prince said, in horror. He raced towards the meadow, and the roars from the guns got louder.
The Great Prince, at last, reached the meadow. He gasped.
Bambi and the girls were running, crying out for help. Suddenly, there was a gunshot, a thud, and Amber tripped to the ground with a scream of pain.
Cassie cried out in terror and ran up to the Great Prince. Bambi was with her.
"You're going to be okay," started the Great Prince, and another gunshot beat upon their ears.
The Great Prince thrust Cassie and Bambi behind him, then galloped out into the meadow. He grabbed Amber and thrust her onto his back, then raced back to the cover of the forest.
"Run," he shouted at Bambi and Cassie. The fawns raced off into the forest, as a final gunshot was heard.
Silence.
| Previous Page | 1 2 |
| July 29, 2013 | ||
Now, it's good, but I do have a bit of criticism - mostly, Faline. I
can understand that she wouldn't like Bambi's friends, and be cold to
them, but physical violence seems like something her character is
incapable of - this is a really common phenomenon, really, and
actually a bit difficult to avoid, especially when writing a different
character as Bambi's love interest - it's called "Character
Derailment." Just a warning, but other than that, which is nitpicking,
it's good. ![]() |