but she doesn't ask.  He's trusted her enough for one day.  Em takes all of this in stride.  She doesn't react.  Cole is confused by this.

           "I don't see anything wrong with you."

           "Then you must be blind," he mumbles.  He doesn't look at her.

           "So you have a few battle scars.  So what.  That doesn't change who you are.  Which, I don't know yet but I will find out."

           "Yeah, well, I've gotta go.  Don't worry.  I'll be in distance.  If you need me, just yell."  With that he walks into a section of trees.  Em lets him go.  She knows he feels self-conscious.  She knows she needs to respect that.

           Em goes to bed later that night after making it back into the cave.  She faintly notices Cole coming in later.

           Ch. 3

          Em wakes up early the next morning.  She stands up and stretches her muscles, sore from being still for so long, and goes to the top of the cave.  There's a clear path so it's easy to get up.  Cole must come up here.  Probably to do what she's doing.  To watch the sunrise.

         Em watches the sun rise into the sky.  This is her only happiness without Jay.  She watches the colors change from dark blue to purple, then red, then pink.  Then she hears Cole behind her.  "Beautiful sunrise isn't it."

        The phrase startles her.  Before she can stop it, her mind flashes back to that morning when she first slept with Drew.  The first morning she started cheating on Jay.  She thought she had blocked out most of her memories.  This one came back.  It hurt. 

        When she doesn't answer, Cole asks her, "You okay?"

         Em shakes her head.  Her head gets all dizzy and her stomach feels sick with pain, regret, sorrow.  She needs to get away.  Now.  She needs to be alone.  Her head fills with the pain she thought she had left behind.  She can't stand remembering.

         "I need to go.  I... I just need to be alone."

        "Em, what's wrong.  Em..." Cole tries to hold her still.

         "Memories.  I..... I don't want to remember.  I don't...." she doesn't finish.  Her mind reeling, she turns and runs.  She runs blindly.  Away from the sun, away from those words.  She doesn't care where she goes.  She just wants to find a place to cry.  To make the pain leave again.

           She keeps running.  She stops as she starts to cry.  She finds herself at the foot of the mountain.   The mountain that she stayed on for days.  Where she cried off her pain the first time.  She's back to do it again.  She goes to the top, and starts sobbing.  She sobs through the night and crushes the memories.  She falls asleep when the moon reaches the pinnacle of its climb through the sky. 

           She wakes up the next morning confused.  Then she remembers.  She was crying.  Why?  She remembers Cole, then running off.  It must have been a memory that came back.  But she doesn't remember.  She doesn't want to.  She just wants to find her way back to Cole.  She doesn't want to be alone.  Something about her past makes her not want to be alone.

          She goes down the mountain and looks around.  She doesn't see anything familiar.  Then she sees the sun.  Already rising, she decides to head toward it.  It should lead her to Cole's cave.  She starts off. 

*                                                                                                                       *

         Emethyst's heart is gone.  Without it, she can't remember anything about what happened.  She achieved her goal.  Not just crushing her heart, but forgetting about what happened.  The memories would be too painful. 

        When she does remember something, it's from her brain.  The only way to remember it, is to have something from that memory repeated or reminded of.  She doesn't want to remember.  When she remembers, her heart grows back a tiny bit.  It allows the pain to return.  She can't stand the pain of the memories.

        She has to crush that piece of her heart to make the memory go away.  She has to get rid of all the pain by doing what she needs to do.  Cry, run, whatever.  When the pain is gone, she can make her heart go away.  She will then not remember anymore. 

         This process takes time, energy, and pain.  She is exhausted when she's finished.  She hurts when crushing her heart.  She feels like a part of her is disappearing.  But, she doesn't want anything to do with her heart anymore.  She doesn't want to deal with the heartbreak again.

*                                                                                                                       *

Ch. 4

         As she walks, she thinks.  She remembers Jay, but she has blocked out what had happened to him.  She knows it's bad, but she doesn't remember how it happened.  She doesn't want to know.  Right now, she just wants to feel safe.  She wants to get back to Cole.  He's her only protection.

         She finds herself in front of some trees.  She remembers Cole going through them.  Maybe if she goes through them, she'd get back to his cave.  She heads into the woods.  It's darker in there, but it's light enough to see where she's going.  She looks through a spot in the trees from time to time to make sure she's heading toward the sun.

        After traveling for a while, she hears something.  Something walking.  She stops.  She doesn't hear it anymore.  She looks around then keeps walking when she doesn't see anything.  Then, she sees light ahead.  Em goes through a spot in the trees and finds herself at Cole's cave.  But there's one problem.  He's not there.

        After checking in the cave and around it, she comes to the conclusion he's gone.  Where and how long, she doesn't know.  But she does know one thing; someone has walked out into the clearing.  She looks at the thing. 

         A wolf.  No.  Now three wolves.  They're looking at her hungrily.  "You look awfully skinny to be out here on your own," one of them says.  He's obviously the leader. 

         "I'm not alone."  Em hides her fear.  She's too weak still and if they tried, they could overpower and kill her.  She was ready to die a few days ago, but she doesn't want to die like this. 

          "You look alone to me," the wolf says licking his lips.  "You look tasty too.  You would be a good meal."

          Em backs up.  Her tail touches the side of the cave.  She's trapped.  The wolves are surrounding her, she's too weak to fight them off, and Cole's not here.  Cole!  That's it!  "Cole!  Cole help!"  Em starts to shake.  She's alone again.  And this time, she's really going to